


Afterlife

by Crystal_Grace



Category: Dragon Age (Video Games), Dragon Age: Inquisition
Genre: Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, F/M, First Time, Fluff and Smut, Helping Solas with his plans, Living Together, Modern Girl in Thedas, Not Beta Read, POV First Person, POV Solas, POV Third Person, Present Tense, Protagonist is not Inquisitor (Dragon Age), Revealing the Future, Romance, Sharing a Bed, Solas Smut, Solas is Fen'Harel, fast burn
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2018-08-11
Updated: 2019-06-07
Packaged: 2019-06-25 18:27:46
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 14
Words: 36,274
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/15646434
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Crystal_Grace/pseuds/Crystal_Grace
Summary: A wish is granted to a dying girl, taking her to the man she loves.Believing it is a dream, Tina opens her eyes in Solas' bedroll while he travels with the Inquisitor through the Hinterlands.She reveals pretty much everything she knows about the events of the game.What's going to become of the story when the characters know what's ahead?





	1. Dream

**Author's Note:**

> This has been bugging me for a week and I decided to write it now that I can. I got no idea where this is going or how often I'll update.  
> Let me know what you think? I hope you like it.
> 
> (11.Dec.2018) I got an idea of where this is going, now, but update frequency is a mystery even to me.

 

 

 

Once again the pain has me drifting in between awareness and unconsciousness. I'm used to it by now, even though sometimes I can't tell where one begins and the other ends. The medication is never able to keep pain away for long, and my body tries to cope with it through sleep.

  
It's not the first time I dream about Solas, and I'm delighted by it happening again. It's the best thing to give me some happiness, even if I know it'll be over when I open my eyes. Just feeling his body so close to mine is enough to have my heart warming up with comfort.

  
I'm cuddling up to his bare chest, snaking my arm across it and nuzzling his neck. His warmth and scent are amazing and I don't want to let go.

 

...

 

Solas is pulled away from the Fade by an unusual if not unknown sensation. The Veil in the area isn't thin, so whatever is causing it likely is unrelated to the Fade. He cannot explain or even begin to imagine what is happening to his body beyond the sensation on his skin. As he opens his eyes he can be sure whatever it is, it's not physical. There is nothing close to him.  
Outside, the voices of the Herald talking to Varric can be heard. They are once again talking about the Champion of Kirkwall's adventures. It wouldn't surprise the mage if they're focusing on the former slave's actions. The Herald is specially interested in the man. But Solas doesn't care, specially with this anomaly going on over his body.

  
There is a warmth without a clear source suspiciously similar to someone being next to him, accompanied by the weight of something that isn't there. Were he an ignorant man he could think of the work of a ghost, but he knows no spirit is with him at the moment. His magic also confirms nothing he knows is at work.

  
He tries to sit up only to find himself unable to. There is no paralysis neither restraint, but a persistent feeling instilling him to wait. His curiosity intensifies, there is clearly an outside force at work, and he cannot imagine what it is. Were he younger and inexperienced he would panic, but he simply decides to wait and observe.

 

...

 

His skin is so soft I can't resist kissing it. I wish he would embrace me and pull me closer, but he's still asleep. I hug him tight as I nuzzle his neck and shoulder, and with a gasp he comes awake. "Who are you?" I simply hum and continue to nuzzle the crook of his neck, and then I feel his hand on my back, but instead of caressing me he pulls me away. I whine and try to cling to his comfort, I'll probably awake if he separates us and I don't want to go back to the pain.

  
"Hmmm Solas, just a bit longer." He stiffens and I take the opportunity to lace one of my legs on his and tighten my arm around his chest.

  
"How do you know me? Who are you?" He tries once again to pull me away but I hold tighter.

  
"Please let me stay here." And then his arm relaxes against my shoulders with a sigh.

  
"Alright, if you stay will you answer my questions?" This dream is so realistic it makes me very happy. To feel his chest rumbling as he speaks adds another layer of comfort.

  
"Anything for you, vhenan." He stiffens again and I almost chuckle at the laggy dream. I guess my medications are affecting the fluidity of my dreams now too.

  
"Who are you?" He asks after a deep breath.

  
"Tina." I answer before kissing his neck. His scent is really amazing, it reminds me of the delicious smell on cats' neck.

  
"Please refrain from doing that."

  
"Aw why? You smell amazing and your skin is so soft too." I close my eyes and nuzzle him once again. He sighs.

  
"How do you know me?"

  
"From Dragon Age, of course."

  
"How did you get here?"

  
"Sleeping, obviously."

  
"Sleeping?" I hum as answer. "What are you?" I chuckle.

  
"What sort of question is that?"

  
"A reasonable one." I hug him tighter as I breathe him deeper.

  
"I'm human, obviously."

  
"That you are not." I nuzzle him despite his request, this is just too good to pass up.

  
"Hmm Solas, I'm human, really. Check the ears."

  
"Ears' shape does not mean much. Kossiths' ears are pointed and it does not make them elven."

  
"Hmm whatever. I'm human."

  
"Chuckles, who are you talking to in th- what? How? Who?" Hm? Varric here?

  
"Oh come on Varric, shoo. Leave me alone with him." I say still face-deep in Solas' neck.

  
"Chuckles?"

  
"Leave us, Varric, I will explain later." There is a rustle of heavy fabric and I imagine Varric is gone.

  
"Hmm good." I say as I nuzzle him again.

  
"Why do you do that?"

  
"Because you're amazing."

  
"Why did you call me vhenan?"

  
"Because you're my heart. I love you." I hold him tight.

  
"Where have we met?"

  
"Told you, Dragon Age."

  
"And Varric?"

  
"Same thing. What's with the weird questions? Can't we just enjoy the moment?"

  
"As much as this is rather enjoyable I would prefer to know who I am laying with."

  
"I told you, I'm Tina. You should know that. This dream is weird."

  
"You believe this to be a dream?" He asks after a moment in silence. I chuckle.

  
"What else would it be, vhenan?"

  
"You are awake, Tina." I nuzzle him with a hum while holding him tight.

  
"No, you're still here instead of my pillow so I'm sleeping."

  
"This is not a dream, Tina. We are not in the Fade."

  
"Of course not, the Fade doesn't exist."

  
"What did you say?"

  
"Hmmm Solas, so many questions. You never questioned me before."

  
"Before?"

  
"In the other dreams."

  
"You dream of me often?"

  
"M-hm. Lovely dreams." I nuzzle him again.

  
"And where do you dream if you say the Fade does not exist?"

  
"In my head? I don't know."

  
"Would you look at me?" I take a deep breath, inhaling his scent, and pull up to look at him. He seems surprised but he is just as handsome as always. I can't help a smile.

  
"You are so beautiful, vhenan." He frowns and it confuses me. "What is it?"

  
"I have never seen you before." And just like that it feels like my stomach was punched and filled with ice. He is rejecting me. I can't bear another one, not in a dream too. It isn't fair.

  
"No... not here too... please, Solas." The tears are on my face, hot and streaming freely. He seems completely shocked. "Twice in the game is enough, don't leave me in my dream too, please. I love you, don't leave me." I hug him again and start sobbing against his chest. "Please..."

  
"Tina..." I hear his voice from behind the curtain of pain. "Tina..."

  
"Don't leave me, Solas." I plead and realize my voice is rough from crying.

  
"I am here." He says while soothingly moving his hand on my back. I hold him tight before relaxing. After a while he continues "What do you mean I left you twice in the game? What game is that?"

  
"Dragon Age, Solas. Told you."

  
"The Dragon Age you know me from is a game?" I hum. "What sort of game?"

  
"RPG." It's so nice to hear his heartbeat. I nuzzle his chest now.

  
"What is arpgee?"

  
"Role-playing game." This feels like an inception of sorts, it's so weird.

  
"How does it work?"

  
"Hmm. I play as a character in a story and discover things, talk to other characters, kill enemies, craft stuff."

  
"How did you meet me in this game?"

  
"I played as Herald and you were my companion and love interest. God... you're so soft and warm." I nuzzle him again.

  
"What do you mean you played as Herald?"

  
"Exactly that. In the game I was the Herald."

  
"Is it a play? A reenactment?"

  
"No, it's a game. Video game. I played it in my computer."

  
"What is a video game?" Inception indeed... weird dream.

  
"Er... it's hard to explain. It's a collection of graphics, text and audio controlled by a bunch of code."

  
"What is a computer?"

  
"A machine." He stays silent for a couple of minutes and I change my position, going back to how I was before and immediately nuzzling his neck.

  
"Where are you from?"

  
"Earth."

  
"Is it a nation?" I chuckle.

  
"It's a planet, vhenan."


	2. Stubborn

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> More questions.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So another chapter found its way towards me and I bring it to you. Writing on the phone is not so bad when the software is nice.  
> Thank you very much to everyone who has given me kudos and left comments. I hope you enjoy this chapter. ♡

Solas could not believe his eyes when the energy he felt began to take shape. At first it was simply a glow, but at some point it became condensed until it was akin to a spirit. The energy was not coming from the Fade, of that he was sure, but if not from it, where? In all his years of study he never thought he would see something unrelated to the Fade. Even the Titans, being the earth themselves, were linked to the Fade through lyrium.

  
The energy was definitely forming a female shape, glowing an intense gold. Solas wondered if this could be yet another anomaly caused by the Breach. But could it be if it had no connection to the Fade?

  
And then, with a pulse that could very much be a breath of life, the glowing shape turned to flesh, surprising Solas yet again.  
It was definitely a woman holding him tight, breathing into his shoulder and with an arm across his chest. She had a rich earth brown hair covering most of her head, making him unable to see her face, but her visible ear was rounded. Still, she did not possess the signature present in humans or dwarves, even if her body already excluded the latter as a possibility. What was she?

  
Her skin was dark and smooth against his pale one, even darker than the First Enchanter's. He was going through his memories in hopes of finding a moment when he had seen or heard about a human with such features but her soft moan as she nuzzled his neck brought his attention immediately back. She was conscious.

  
He began questioning her, and she would not let go if him. Never he imagined waking up to something like this. Solas could not deny having a warm and soft body close to his was something he missed, but the reason he had not pushed her away was simple: he still could not move. Was she a mage? Without a connection to the Fade he could not imagine the woman being one, but whatever was happening to him was her influence.

  
And then she became distressed when he tried to pull her away, even clinging tighter. He relented and decided to continue his questions, only to find out she believed him to be her lover, to the extent of calling him vhenan. He could not remember ever meeting anyone like her, much less in this broken age. He has been awake for barely over a year and she was unlike anything he had ever seen. He would remember such remarkable face: almond-shaped eyes, as black as night and plump lips. Her delicate nose round as a berry between the sculpted cheekbones. Everything framed by the beautiful mass of her dark and long curly hair.

  
Then she told him she was not refering to the age, but to the name of a game he is not familiar with. What could arpgee be? No, it was RPG, role-playing game. Aside from spirits interested in some event and actors in plays he had never heard of people playing as others. And the more she explained the less he comprehended. Video game? Computer? But the most shocking of all yet explained much was the fact she came from another planet.

  
Solas knows of the existance of other planets, his people have studied the stars, but he never thought he would meet someone from such places. How did she even get here? He tried asking, and once again she answered by believing to be asleep.

  
One thing continuously pulls at his mind: she not only knows him and Varric, ignoring what she said about playing as Herald, but she loves him and believes him to have abandoned her in that game. How could a game affect someone so deeply? And more importantly: how do her people know of them?

  
"Tina..." he tries once again, "how do you know of the Inquisition?"

  
"The game, vhenan. It's all a game."

  
No, it is not. But she definitely believes it to be. He wonders how she is going to react when she realizes this is no dream about characters that do not exist. Before he is able to do anything, Varric speaks once again to the Herald, who had apparently been away, but this time about the girl. In only a few seconds the elf is inside the tent inquiring about the visitor.

  
"Solas, where did you find a girl in the middle of nowhere?" The Herald asks just as soon as she steps in.

  
"Who's this?" The girl asks as she raises her head from his neck.

  
"The Herald of Andraste. Who are you?" It is not often Solas sees the Herald pulling her title, much less with such harsh voice.

  
"You shouldn't be here." The girl says and that seems to infuriate the elf. "Go away... leave me with him." And she lowers her head to his neck once more. Solas doesn't know what to do at this point.

  
"How dare you speak to me like that in my camp?" Infuriated indeed.

  
"Urgh... this dream isn't what it should be... go awaaay."

  
"Dream?" That seems to hold back the Herald's ire for the moment.

  
"She believes she is dreaming, Herald. That none of this is real."

  
"Are you serious, Chuckles?"

  
"Yes."

  
"What is she? Drunk or stupid?" The Herald asks, annoyed once more.

  
"I would say confused and stubborn." Solas says, calmly.

  
"And why are you laying with her anyway?"

  
"I am afraid I cannot move."

  
"What?! Did she charm you? Is she a blood mage?" There goes the Herald with her prejudice towards magic.

  
"No, I cannot identify the source of my semi-paralysis."

  
"Semi?" The dwarf asks.

  
"Oh come on, shut up you all, go away! Shoo! You're not welcome here! Disappear!" The look of surprise in Varric's face almost immediately turns to amusement when he notices how furious the Herald is. That is a very territorial woman who clearly feels threatened by Tina at the moment.

  
"I can only move my head and arms, to answer your question, Varric. Herald, I ask that you forgive the girl, she really believes this is a dream." The woman sighs and that gives Solas wome relief.

  
"Fine. How did she get here? There's not even a village nearby. Where did you pick her up?"

  
"Yeah, Chuckles, quite smooth huh, taking beautiful girls to your tent in the middle of the night."

  
"I did nothing of the sort. She appeared beside me. I am still trying to get answers from her."

  
"God... this is the worst dream I've had with you, Solas, and to think it began so good." She then sits up, and the paralysis completely lifts. "Maybe I'll wake up soon... not that I want to, but you two are so noisy, and nosy! Should've let me alone with him."

  
"Girl," the Herald says, firmly but not angry anymore "you are not sleeping."

  
"Yeah right."

  
"You're not, Dreamy." Already gave her a nickname?

  
"I'll say, first time my dream tries to convince me I'm not sleeping."

  
"Why do you think you're dreaming?" The Herald asks, genuine curiosity on her face.

  
"Because none of you exist, obviously." And with that Varric starts a loud laugh which the elf is sure has awakened the entire camp.

 

...

 

"We don't exist?" The Herald has such a skeptical expression, this dream is crazy.

  
"Yeah, you don't." Weird inception. Solas sits up behind me and I realize he plans on standing, I don't want him to leave me. "Please don't go." He looks at me with a conflicted expression but then sighs and nods. I smile and pull his arm next to me. It's not easy to see in the tent since this dream plays at night, but I can still see the amused look on Varric's face and the surprised one on the Herald's face. "Are you guys happy for interrupting my nice moment?" I don't have many of those, I treasure these dreams.

  
"You clearly know him," the Herald says, "but he doesn't seem to know you. Why?"

  
"Dunno. You shouldn't be here either and yet..." I wave my free hand at them.

  
"You knew me too, and I don't know you." Varric says and I begin hearing voices outside. No, not more people to interrupt us... this is turning into a nightmare.

  
"Damn... guys I just want to spend a few moments with the man I love," their eyes go wide, "is that too much to ask?" Shit, I'm gonna cry. Stupid dream.

  
"Hey Boss, what's going on?" Oh no, not Bull.

  
"Aaaargh!" I groan as I squeeze my free hand on my pants. "Goddamn this fucking nightmare! I don't want to see you all, just him!"

  
"Er, Boss? Who's the girl?" Bull now has his head poking into the tent and watches me with a careful eye. The others are confused. I'm feeling awful.

  
"That's what we're trying to figure out." The Herald says. "She thinks this is a dream."

  
"And she knows me and Chuckles."

  
"I know you all. Now leave us alone, will you?"

  
"What exactly happened while I was sleeping?" Bull asks.

  
"I believe it is best I talk to her alone," Solas finally says, "your presence is distressing her." No joke, I'm on the verge of tears. The Herald watches us for a moment and then sighs.

  
"Fine. But I want an explanation soon." And with that she leaves, followed by the others, and I can still hear them talking about me outside. Weird dream.

  
"Tina," Solas calls and I turn to look at him, "do you trust me?"

  
"Of course." He seems surprised, but then smiles.

  
"Close your eyes." I do, and next I feel his other hand on my temple. "Sleep."

  
I'm gonna go right ahead and say this dream only keeps getting weirder and weirder. I know dreams sometimes jump from one place to another, but I never thought I would find myself dreaming of dreaming, because if I'm in the Fade then I'm dreaming. And this is definitely the Fade with its green foggy atmosphere and floating rocks with weird sculptures. Once again: inception.

  
"Tina." Solas calls from behind me and I turn to look, he looks exactly the same as a moment ago, but now he has a tunic on.

  
"I miss the bare chest." He is taken aback but then chuckles.

  
"You are not afraid of speaking your mind."

  
"Why would I? I'm dreaming."

  
"Now you are."

  
"No, I already was."

  
"You are stubborn. Can you really not tell the difference?"

  
"No? I mean, it's creepy here now in the raw Fade but other than that it's the same."

  
"You said before the Fade did not exist."

  
"It does in your world. Which is of what I'm dreaming of now."

  
"Tina, you are in my world now."

  
"Heh, this dream really is amusing trying to convince me I'm awake."

  
"Now, you are asleep. You are right beside me in the Waking, in the tent which is in the south of the Hinterlands, your mind, however, is here in the Fade."

  
"No, this is all a dream and when I wake up I'll be on my bed hooked to medication." I really don't want to wake up.

  
"Medication? You are not sick."

  
"Of course not, I'm dreaming."

  
"Look at this." He moves his hand and the green creepy place changes into a forest. I can see snow and... wow... it's the Breach.

  
"Is this the woods near Haven?"

  
"It is. What do you know of it?"

  
"It's the first base of the Inquisition."

  
"The first?"

  
"Yeah..." I can see the village on the horizon. It's very sad it has to be destroyed. "Corypheus destroys it and you lead the Inquisition to Skyhold."

  
"You know this from the game?"

  
"Yeah. Hey Solas... since you brought me to Haven in the Fade, can I get a kiss?" He is surprised.

  
"A kiss?" I hum and he continues. "Why would I? I do not even know you."

  
"Because it's my dream."

  
"I believe it is time for you to wake up."

  
And I'm back in the tent. Weird dream. I never had a dream this complex.

  
"Now you are awake." He says and I notice he is far, too far. I scoot over and get back to snuggling him. "You sure enjoy touching me."

  
"I do. I love you, Solas."

  
"Would you still act this way if you knew you were awake?"

  
"Why do you keep insisting?" I sigh and nuzzle his chest. "As much as I would love to be really here with you, this is a dream."

  
"You are no longer in your Earth. You are in Thedas. This is real." I laugh and then kiss his chest before raising my head to look at him.

  
"That's not possible. Kiss me?"

  
"I am sorry, but I cannot." Shit. This is it. I'm done. I stand up and walk as well as the low ceiling allows me, but before I'm out his hand holds me. "Where are you going?"

  
"I'm gonna wake up. I'm tired of this nightmare. I can't bear any more rejections and weird questions. I can always fall asleep again and have a good dream where you don't reject me."

  
"Tina you are not dreaming, how do you expect to wake up?"

  
"I don't know. I'll try to kill myself, danger always wakes me up."

  
"You cannot do that! This is no dream, you will die if you try."

  
"How insistent." I take a deep breath. "Let me go. I don't want to be in a dream where you don't love me."

  
"Fenedhis!" And then it all goes black.


	3. Awake

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Tina accepts she's not sleeping.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I didn't think I would be writing this so often, but here, have another chapter! :)  
> Thank you very much for kudos and comments, I'm surprised by the reception and very happy you're enjoying this. ♡

I never thought I could have a dream this long, but when I open my eyes and find myself still inside a tent, what other explanation could there be? Maybe I was in a coma? A dream this long couldn't be natural. I notice Solas isn't here anymore. A new dream then?

  
Having nothing to do, I stand up, noticing the roof is higher this time, and walk outside, only to find a person I have never seen before standing by the side of the tent, as if guarding it.

  
"Unless you need something you should go back inside." The person I now realize is a woman tells me in a very serious tone.

  
"Why?"

  
"You are not allowed to roam the camp." Great... another weird dream.

  
"Whatever, I'm not going back there." She looks at me with a menacing expression and I feel a bit intimidated.

  
"If you resist I'll have to bind you." What?

  
"Hell no."

  
"Girl, do you need anything?" How can she be so intimidating? She has such a pretty face and is so slim.

  
"No." I wish Solas was here though.

  
"Then get back inside."

  
"No." She sighs and in a matter of seconds I'm turned against her body and she has a rope around my middle and arms. What the hell? The more I struggle the tighter she wraps it, and it hurts. I shouldn't feel pain in a dream. Then she moves me inside the tent and leaves me there.

  
"Sorry, but I warned you." And with that she leaves. I'm too confused to speak. What is this dream about?

 

  
The weirdest thing is waiting. I don't remember ever having to wait in a dream, things just skip ahead.

  
"Girl, are you hungry?" The woman's voice calls from outside.

  
"No." But I'm thirsty. Weird. "Got something to drink?"

  
And after a moment of quiet when I begin thinking just how strange this dream is, the woman enters the tent with a weird object in hand.

  
"Here." She uncorks the thing and brings it close to my mouth. I frown.

  
"What's this?"

  
"Water."

  
"And the thing the water is in?" She looks confused at my question.

  
"A... waterskin?" Er... weird dream indeed...

  
"Is it even clean? How many people have drank from it?" She frowns but before she says anything I continue. "Okay, whatever. Can't get sick in a dream anyway." I open my mouth so she could pour a bit of water, but she just keeps staring.

  
"You still think this is a dream?" Oh not you too!

  
"It is." She was going to say something but then shakes her head and with a sigh she motions the waterskin so I open my mouth for her to pour a bit. It's weird to drink like this, even weirder is the taste of the water. It tastes a bit muddy.

  
"More?" I nod even though it makes me a bit disgusted. Stupid dream with stupid thirst. I drink some more and when I'm good she corks the thing.

  
"You should accept you're awake before you regret it." And she leaves before I can say anything.

  
What's it with people in these dreams telling me it's not a dream? Could I really be awake? No, it's impossible. Dragon Age is a game, it's fiction. There's no way I could be in it. This is a dream. I just have to wake up.

 

 

But it doesn't matter how long I wait, I don't wake up. Now I'm definitely hungry. Could... no... but... no, not possible. It doesn't matter how many fanfics I've read about girls ending up in Thedas, that's fiction just as the name says.

  
Usually when I get hungry while asleep, which hasn't happened in a very long time because of the medications, I wake up. But not this time it seems. Not real, not real, this is a dream and I will wake up.

  
I don't, and the hunger is bothering me too much to ignore. I sigh and decide to ask the woman. "Excuse me!" I call the loudest I can without shouting. "Are you still there?"

  
To my weird relief the woman pokes her head inside. "Need anything?"

  
"I uh, I'm hungry." She nods and leaves. Well, that was weird. A few minutes pass and she returns, this time stepping into the tent.

  
"I have your food, will you behave if I remove the rope or do you want to eat like a mabari?" Like a mabari...? Oh. No, thank you.

  
"I promise not to make a fuss."

  
"Good." She approaches me and starts working on the rope, when I'm free I take a while to rub the skin in hopes of soothing the marks. "Wait here."

  
"But-" She shows the rope to me as a point and I simply nod. God, this is weird.

  
Soon she's back with a bowl that smells very good. "Here." She hands it to me and I take the spoon to try the soup that looks like nothing I've ever eaten.

  
"What's this?" It tastes good.

  
"Ram." Well, no wonder people hunt them, this is good meat. She is standing and I wonder if she's been up all this time outside. Well, not like she should be able to get tired in a dream. Either way, it makes me uncomfortable.

  
"Sit with me." She analyzes me for a brief moment and then sits down on the spot.

  
"Why do you think you're dreaming?" Her question shouldn't surprise me at this point, but it does.

  
"I'm honestly beginning to doubt that, but it doesn't make sense. I'll probably laugh when I wake up about how close I was to believing a dream was real."

  
"What could convince you it's real?"

  
"Pain probably. I've never felt pain in dreams. That rope hurt me though."

  
"Sorry about that, we can't have you making a fuss in camp. You stay in the tent. Herald's orders."

  
"Hm. What's your name? I'm Tina."

  
"You can call me Blades." I'm not sure I want to know the reason.

  
"Pleased to meet you, Blades. What's the Herald like?"

  
"She's nice. Helps a lot." I nod. At least she's not mean. Wait, why do I care? When I wake up this will all be gone.

  
"Can I ask you to do something for me?" She raises her eyebrow and tilts her head, she's very suspicious.

  
"You can ask." Right, doesn't mean she'll do it.

  
"Can you cut my arm?"

  
"The mage warned me you would want to harm yourself, I didn't think you'd ask."

  
"If this is a dream it won't hurt, no matter how much blood comes out."

  
"You're not, which means you'll make a mess and we'll have to spend resources to patch you up." I sigh. People in dreams were never this insistent. Could... no. No. What if? No... But Solas... No.

  
"Will Solas be back soon?"

  
"No idea. Herald took him and the others for a mission."

  
"Hm. Can't I wait outside? I want some fresh air."

  
"If you try anything you'll be bound and you're not getting out of them until the Herald says so, hear me?"

  
"I won't do anything." She then stands up and takes the bowl from me, I get up and follow her outside.

  
Last time I exited the tent I didn't look around, my eyes went straight to Blades, but now I can see that we're in a clearing, surrounded by large and tall trees. The colors of the sky are beginning to change into twilight, I wonder how long it is until dusk.

  
"You can sit over there." She points to a long log by the campfire. I notice there are two other people wearing the same armor as her. Scout's uniform, I guess.

  
I make my way over the log, followed by the woman, and sit down. It feels nice to have the warmth of the fire near and the sound of the wood burning is quite relaxing. The longer this dream lasts the least it feels like a dream.

  
"Hey there." A man calls from behind and as I turn to look I notice it's Varric approaching. "Are you making sense yet?" He has a grin on his face but he seems suspicious of me. I was going to stand but he waves his hand. "No need to stand, I'm coming over." He sits beside me and I feel a bit anxious. "So, Tina, was it?" I nod. "Do you still think you're dreaming?"

  
"Not so sure anymore to be honest, and I don't know what to think of it."

  
"Chuckles said you simply appeared beside him." Appeared?

  
"How so?" He shrugs.

  
"I don't know, but he sounded serious and considering nobody saw you walk into his tent, I'd say he's telling the truth."

  
"Can you pinch my arm?" He looks surprised.

  
"Oh ignore her, Master Varric," the scout says, "she thinks pain will prove she's not sleeping." He looks even more surprised at that.

  
"I don't feel pain in dreams, so..." I sigh. "It's just a pinch, you won't have to spend resources on me if I'm not dreaming."

  
"Kid, you're not. But what do you mean by 'spend resources?'"

  
"She wanted me to cut her arm."

  
"What? Dreamy, you're crazy, kid."

  
"I'm not a kid, Varric. I'm nineteen. And that should have proved I'm sleeping."

  
"It would have gotten you a scar and a lot of pain." I shrug.

  
"So... pinch me?" He sighs heavily.

  
"If it'll convince you you're awake, fine. Don't blame me for the bruise, you asked."

  
"Yeah, sure." I offer him my arm, "the hardest you caaAAAAOUCH! Goddamn it!" Damn, that hurt. I massage the area trying to soothe the pain. It will definitely bruise.

  
"Did that feel like a dream to you?"

  
"No... it didn't..." But then... "I... I don't understand... being here... if this is real... how?"

  
"Where are you from?" Should I even let him know things?

  
"Another world."

  
"No wonder you're struggling to believe this. But how do you know us?"

  
"There are... stories about you in my world. Don't know how they got access to what happened here though."

  
"I'd bet the Breach has a hand in it." I shrug.

  
"No idea. One moment I'm in my bed, the next I'm holding Solas."

  
"That is an interesting thing, how can you love him if you're from somewhere else?"

  
"He always felt real to me." He raises an eyebrow and I guess he doesn't really think it's possible.

  
"When everything sucked, he kept my heart warm." Even if he would always leave me in the end.

  
"A love that crosses worlds uh? I guess that's something the ladies would buy. I should write it." I chuckle and shake my head.

  
"Why am I not surprised?" He shrugs.

  
"If you really know me then you shouldn't be." He winks and stands. "Have you eaten?"

  
"Yeah." I notice he is going to get some food for himself. "I thought you'd be with the Herald."

  
"She took Buttercup with her."

  
"Hm. Do you think they'll be long?"

  
"Probably not." He comes back to sit beside me. "Miss Chuckles already?"

  
"Heh... yeah..." God, is this really real? What does Solas thinks of what I did? Oh no... "Is he... you know... with the Herald?"

  
"He is- oh you mean like romanticly? No. She's trying to get me to introduce her to a friend of mine." Hm? Who? This wasn't in the game.

  
"Oh."

  
"She would've skinned you if she were." He winks so I don't think he's serious. That would've been scary. "I don't think anyone would have blamed her, the way you were clutching at Chuckles."

  
"That was quite the scene uh..." He laughs really loudly then.

  
"You have no idea, Dreamy. The look on Chuckles' face as you rubbed yourself against him was the best. I never saw that man so confused before." He tilts his head. "Now that I think about it I wonder if he was confused because he doesn't know what to do with a girl."

  
"I will let you know, Varric that I do know." Solas says as he approaches from behind me and I see the Herald, Bull, Sera and Blackwall coming along. I'm suddenly breathless and warm.

  
"Breathe, Dreamy."

  
"I uh... er... I'm... sorry for my earlier behavior, Solas."

  
"I see you're less crazy now." The Herald says while dropping her gear by a tent.

  
"Not without some incidents, Your Worship." Blades tells her. Oh well...

  
"Oh? What happened?"

  
"It took a while to convince her she is awake." And the woman reports everything. I feel embarassed and lost. I never thought this could be real... and now... what should I do?

  
"Well, that's interesting." The Herald finally says as she sits down on the other log to eat. I notice everyone has a bowl now and are approaching the fire. "Now that we have Blackwall we can return to Haven and you'll tell us everything."

  
"What?"

  
"If you know about us then you'll tell us what you know."

  
"Oh. Yeah... sure..." Shit.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Send me a mail if you want to chat :) crystal.grace.fics@gmail.com


	4. Nightmare

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Tina has a nightmare and the group gets back on the road.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I hope you enjoy ♡

Should I tell them what I know? All of it? I guess I should let them have the choice of using my knowledge. What's the point of knowing and not helping after all? But I won't spill secrets, specially Solas'. But... should I let him know that I know?

  
"So," the thunderous voice of Bull says from the other side of the fire, cutting me from my thoughts. I try not to look straight at him because he scares me. "What's this about you appearing beside Solas and saying you wanted to be alone with him? Are you one of his spirit friends?"

  
"No. I'm human."

  
"She said she's from another world, Tiny."

  
"Are you really?" I nod. "Didn't know that was possible."

  
"There are no records of it ever happening." Solas says.

  
"Huh? Aren't you just lying?" Is that a question for me?

  
"She is no common human, of that I am sure." Solas insists and I wonder what he means by that.

  
"What's she then? Is she a mage?" The Herald asks.

  
"I do not feel magic in her, Herald." Hm, I don't know if I'm happy or sad. Using magic is probably fun, but the training is probably hard too. Not to mention demons.

  
"How did you get here?" Blackwall asks from beside Bull.

  
"I don't know. I woke up in the tent."

  
"And before that?" Solas asks.

  
"I remember being in my bed." Another hard day that was.

  
"Maybe she's like you, Herald." Varric says and I'm surprised he isn't calling her by a nickname. He had one for the Inquisitor didn't he? I think I remember him calling my elf Dimples at some point.

  
"Like me?"

  
"You don't remember your time at the Conclave."

  
"Hm. She doesn't look like she had a traumatic experience though." I wish. I wonder if the Nightmare demon took my memories too though. I just shrug, I'm not going to tell them about my sickness. Wait, what about it? Am I healed?

  
"Is something wrong?" Solas asks.

  
"Oh, no... just... a thought. I guess I'll go sleep... if you don't mind? Herald?"

  
"It's fine, we leave early tomorrow so that's best. Go back to the tent you woke in."

  
"Thanks. Good night, everyone." They greet me back, except for Sera who still seems suspicious of me.

  
I lay down and begin thinking about my body. I haven't paid it any mind because I thought it was a dream, but since it's not, what does it mean? Am I healed? I shouldn't even be able to breathe properly if I'm not, not to mention the pain. Whatever brought me here did me the favor of healing me, and I can't say how grateful I am for it.

  
It takes me a while to fall asleep and in the meantime I hear the others outside talking about me. Sera is complaining, saying I'm too suspicious to be treated nicely and that I'm probably a demon in disguise. Solas assures them I'm not and the Herald says there's no reason to treat me badly as long as I cooperate. I wonder what she'd do if I don't. That rope hurt me. "She would have skinned you if she were," Varric's words come back to mind. Was that more than a joke? Eventually darkness takes me.

 

  
I wake up in the softness of my bed, hooked to medication and the oxigen cilinder. So it was a dream after all. Shit. I start crying, and I know it's a bad idea but I can't hold the tears back. Now that I'm here I wish I had spent that time around the fire hugging Solas, that I hadn't retired to the tent so early. Solas is gone, and the crying awakes pains that were numb from sleep. My chest is on fire and breathing is next to impossible. Where's mom? She should be here by now. Damn this. If only I could get out of the bed I would administer the medication myself. If only the tears would stop I could try to breathe properly. If only I didn't love him so much his absence wouldn't be so painful.

  
"Wake up." A voice sounds far, I look around my room but I'm alone. "Tina, wake up."

  
I open my eyes to find myself cold and with tears still running down my cheeks. "Tina." Solas's voice calls grom beside me and I notice he is holding my arm. Oh. We're sharing the tent. And... and he is real, not that life of sadness away from him. I throw myself in his arms, holding him tight, barely registering that he is wearing a shirt this time. If his stiffness is anything to by, he didn't expect this reaction.

  
"Oh Solas... you're real." I rub my face on his chest, he smells a bit like sweat now but I don't mind.

  
"You had a nightmare." His hand starts rubbing soothing circles on my back.

  
"I dreamed I was back home, that this was the dream."

  
"I could not find you in the Fade."

  
"Sorry."

  
"Why are you apologizing?"

  
"Dunno. I don't know how my dream works."

  
"Are you calmer now?"

  
"Yes, but let me stay here a while longer?"

  
"Only a little. I do need to sleep." Oh.

  
"Did I wake you?"

  
"You started trembling and crying. And you would not wake up."

  
"Sorry... I know how much you like sleeping." I let him go, and I lay back down. I wonder why we're sharing the tent. "Solas..."

  
"Yes?"

  
"Why are we sharing the tent?"

  
"Since you came to this world in my bed, the Herald thought fitting we share."

  
"Oh... I don't suppose you like that."

  
"As I said, I prefer knowing the person with whom I share my bed."

  
"You only need to ask, vhenan. Oh, sorry." He stays silent for a couple of minutes.

  
"How do you love me?" I didn't see that question coming.

  
"It's hard to explain. You felt real to me, even if in my world you were only a character. And I wanted you to be happy, I wanted to be with you, to make you smile and help you."

  
"I have questions, but they are best left for another time. We should sleep."

  
"Can I... hold your hand?" He surprises me by offering it to me. I take it immediately and interlock my fingers with his. "Good night, Solas."

  
"Good night, Tina."

 

...

 

 

When the Herald told him to share the bedroll with the girl, the last thing he expected was for her to have a nightmare with which he could not interfere. She was nowhere in the Fade, how could she even dream? "In my head," her words come back to him. Could she really dream inside her own mind? But he could take her to the Fade with him, which means she isn't cut out from it as a Tranquil. She is a mystery. And a mystery who loves him. No, who loves a character that is supposed to be him. Solas doesn't know what to make of that. She clearly treats him as if she has known him for a long time, and if she has strong feelings for him. He cannot deny having her close is comfortable, but he should not encourage her. He has his duty to his people, he does not reciprocate her feelings, it would not be fair to take advantage.

  
"Can I... hold your hand?" What harm could hand-holding do?

 

...

 

 

"Time to get up, sleepy heads." The Herald calls from outside, taking me from a delightful dream where I slept with Solas. Wait, it wasn't a dream, I'm still holding his hand. And he is trying to stand. I let his hand go.

  
"Good morning, Solas."

  
"Hm. Good morning, Tina." He looks so cute rubbing his eyes with that sleepy face. "No more nightmares?"

  
"No. I don't really remember dreaming after... that."

  
"Perhaps your mind needed the respite." He looks so cute I want to kiss him.

  
"Can I... nevermind."

  
"What is it?" He asks while sitting up.

  
"I uh... was going to ask to... hug you." He raises both eyebrows then chuckles.

  
"I see you are thinking before acting now that you no longer thinks this to be a dream."

  
"Yeah well... if you're real it's only polite I ask."

  
"Indeed." He observes me and I feel a bit anxious. What could he be thinking? "I should not encourage this, Tina."

  
"Oh... well... I had to ask." I try a smile but it's so weak. I was rejected after all. I get on my feet quickly and walk to the exit. "I'll be outside."

  
"Morning, Dreamy." Varric calls from the campfire. "Come eat." I walk over there and get a bowl of what looks like oatmeal. I was never a fan of the thing, but beggars can't be choosers. "How was the night with Chuckles?"

  
"Okay." He raises an eyebrow. "What?"

  
"Thought you'd be happier."

  
"Well I am, but he doesn't know me. Sleeping with a stranger isn't good."

  
"I wouldn't mind." Bull says while coming from a tent. "Actually I think it'd be quite fun."

  
"Er..." He laughs and it startles me when he gives me a friendly slap on the shoulder.

  
"Just kidding, girl. Relax." I don't think I can.

  
"Stop harassing the newcomer, Tiny."

  
"Harassing? You haven't seen me harassing yet." He laughs then thankfully walks away.

 

  
After I'm done eating I realize I need to pee, and wonder why it took an entire day. I look around and I have no idea where I'm supposed to go to sort this.

  
"Problem?" Varric asks while taking my bowl from me.

  
"Er... shit..." I look to my feet and take a deep breath. "Where do I go to... you know... pee?"

  
"Out here? Probably a bush if you want privacy." Shit... I was afraid he would say that.

  
"Uh... okay..." I stand up and try to find a place. This sucks... badly.

  
When I'm done I feel disgusted because there's no toilet paper. And I'm lucky I didn't wet my clothes or feet, after all, I've never done this outside.

 

  
Back in camp I see everyone is preparing horses, and it hits me I'll probably have to ride; something I've never done.

  
"Oh there you are." Blades calls from my right and I see her with boots in hands. When she's close she gives me them. "Here. It should fit."

  
"Er... thanks." I look at the boots and they're clearly worn. I hope they're clean at least. The last thing I need is an itch or worse.

  
"Go on." She motions with her hand and I take it she wants me to try the boots now. I sigh. Let's do this. They are comfortable, but I miss having socks to go with shoes. They're a bit loose but I don't think it'll be a problem. "So?"

  
"They're good." She nods.

  
"Great. Good luck out there." Oh.

  
"Thanks. You uh... take care." She shakes her head and walks away.

  
"Ready?" Varric asks from behind me.

  
"I guess. Horses, uh?"

  
"That's right. Do you know how to ride?" I shake my head. "Well, good thing you're riding with Chuckles then." He winks.

  
"I'm riding with Solas?"

  
"Yeah. Herald thinks you're pretty much his responsibility." His grin irks me honestly. What is this dwarf thinking?

  
"I hope he doesn't start hating me. The last thing I want is to be a burden to him."

  
"Nah you're fine. I guess he appreciates the company." And with that he walks towards his horse. Does he? I sure hope so.  
I decide to ask the man in question, and what else could I expect but politeness? I can only hope I'm really not being a problem to him.

  
With help I get on the horse, and even though this was unexpected, it's amazing to be this close to Solas again, specially since it feels like he is the one holding me now.

 

  
The nature around us is marvelous, specially since I've lived my whole life in a city full of buildings and next to no green. The sound of birds is like a sweet melody and I wonder if I'll get to enjoy this kind of experience often. I sure hope so. Combining the great view with the amazing comfort of Solas' body, I feel so good that it takes me a very long time to pay attention to my aching butt. Thankfully that is also around the time they stop for lunch. I wonder how close to Haven we are, but I don't really know how I could ask. Well, I guess there's a very simple way. "How long until we reach Haven?" I start stretching.

  
"Two days." Herald says while Solas gives me a piece of bread and some jerked meat. Hm. I wonder if we're going to pass by the Crossroads.

  
I notice I'm not the only one standing, and I bet they do it for the same reason, except I doubt their butts hurt as much as mine. I also notice the Herald going around collecting herbs.

  
We don't stay long, and with help I'm once again on the horse. Something that also happens quite soon is thirst.

  
"Solas..."

  
"Yes?"

  
"Do you have water?"

  
"A moment." He lets go of the reins and holds my middle, surprising me, while he does something with his other hand. Soon he offers me an object similar to what Blades gave me water in, a waterskin. "Here."

  
"Thank you." I take it from him and try to uncork it, succeeding after a few jerks. I drink a bit, noticing it doesn't taste muddy and I wonder the reason behind it. I give it back to him after I secure the cork and soon I see a marvel right before me. With a simple gesture the reins float back to his hand. Magic. I end up gasping with surprise. "Magic is real." I say almost as a whisper.

  
"Is there no magic in your world?"

  
"No... only legends of a very remote past."

  
"And how is life without it?"

  
"We have machines, science, I guess an advanced version of alchemy. Very dangerous."

  
"How so?"

  
"Scientists discovered ways of controlling viruses and other micro life forms so they can unleash sickness in large populations if they wish. Same for chemicals. And there are bombs that can cause massive damage. Imagine what happened to the Temple of Sacred Ashes but over the whole of Denerim or even larger. I don't really know how big Denerim actually is."

  
"Why would they create such destructive power?"

  
"Control. To conquer territories, to kill people with different religions."

  
"What about different races?"

  
"There are only humans." He stays quiet for a while.

  
"Yet you love an elf who was simply a character, a fantasy. Perhaps what you believe is love is simply amazement towards something different." Eh?

  
"No, don't presume to know how I feel or dare to question its validity, Solas."

  
"I am simply trying to open your mind to the possibility of it being a misunderstanding. After all, you are young."

  
"Don't worry, I already tried to convince myself of it for two years, you don't have to go through the trouble." How dare he question my feelings?! "And you don't have to be the one riding with the confused child. If no one will have me I can walk." His hand on my waist tightens and I realize he never let go after the waterskin.

  
"I apologize. You are correct, I cannot judge your feelings. You are your own person and I should not presume."

  
"Apology accepted, old man." He stiffens. "Don't worry, your secret is safe with me." I whisper.

  
"What do you mean?"

  
"Ask again when we're alone."

  
We continue in silence, with the eventual banter between the party, but I'm sure I got Solas thinking. I take the time just enjoying his body around mine, even if my butt soon begins hurting again.


	5. Pretend

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Wet dreaming, a dip in the river and some friendly questions.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I bring another one :3  
> Thank you very much for kudos and comments, it brightens my day!  
> I hope you like it. ♡

Just as expected, when I'm alone in the tent, complaining to myself that I won't shower before sleep, Solas joins me and questions what I meant earlier. "I know your other name." I answer almost as a whisper and he frowns.

  
"Meaning?" He'll have me say it, smart. I lay down and motion for him to join me. He merely tilts his head, as much as the low tent's roof allows. "It's easier to speak if you're closer. And you'll have to sleep anyway." He sighs but soon lays beside me.

"Fen'Harel." I whisper in his ear and he flinches.

  
"How?" His voice is so low I'm surprised I heard.

  
"I know things, remember?" His eyes on me are so intense.

  
"You said you will not tell anyone, why?"

  
"Because I understand you, I love you, and I want to help you." As much as I can being a mere human.

  
"You... understand? How could you even begin to understand?"

  
"I'll cut you some slack and pretend that doesn't offend me. If the game is right, then you had good reasons."

  
"It was not my intention to offend you, this is a sensitive subject."

  
"I know, vhe- Solas."

  
"When we reach Haven you will tell me all you know."

  
"I will." He relaxes. "Can I hold your hand?" He offers it to me within seconds. Was he already expecting my request? I can't help the smile, after all, I'm with the man I love.

 

...

 

 

Solas is beyond surprised. To discover the girl knows his full identity and understands his reasons is a shock. Could she know everything? How does she intend to help him? And once again she tells him her feelings, and asks for his hand. Physical comfort, something very welcome.

 

The night is uneventful, it seems she hasn't had another nightmare, but whatever happened caused her to move during the night, and Solas wakes up to find her holding onto him like the first time.

  
Having her so close and so willing tempts him beyond reason, the only thing holding him back are the years of experience. He is no longer a foolhardy youth, he knows what kind of consequence could arise from ill-considered actions and he does not wish to hurt her. Still, being alone for so long does not help matters and he finds himself wrapping his arm around her back. Just this should be harmless.

 

...

 

Solas holds me tight as he walks us to the bed. His hungry mouth sucking my lips and tongue has me moaning into the kiss. Soon I'm laying on the bed with him on top of me. Quick hands work on our clothes and I can't wait to feel him naked against me. "Ah... vhenan..." I call as he sucks my neck, hand softly squeezing my breast. My hands on his back scratch him as lightly as I can control when lost in pleasure. My legs rub against his thighs, trying to convince him to get closer. "Oh Solas..." His hands hold my arms tight and push me away, intense eyes watching me hungrily.

  
"Tina..."

  
"Yes?" I ask, breathless and still rubbing my legs. I need him closer.

  
"Wake up."

  
"What?"

  
"Wake up, Tina. You're dreaming."

  
The warmth of his body over mine is swapped by his warmth under me. I'm humping the man. Oh god. I immediately pull away, completely embarrassed. "I'm sorry, oh my god I'm so sorry, Solas."

  
"Calm down." He says with such gentle expression that it only makes me more ashamed. "It is fine. Do not worry, Tina."

  
"I... I didn't do it on purpose..."

  
"I know."

  
"Shit..." And I'm wet too... damn. I run my hands on my face, trying to clear my mind and calm down. "Can we pretend this never happened?"

  
"Of course." I nod multiple times in relief.

  
"Thank you." I stand. "I'll uh... be out there... clearing my head." I put on the boots and leave, finding a clear morning sky.  
What the hell just happened?! I can't believe it... oh god. Well, he said we can act like it didn't happen... but... what could he even be thinking of me after that? No... forget it, nothing happened.

  
"Did something spook you, Dreamy?" Varric comes out of his tent and I notice the weird looks from everyone else around the still burning fire. Well, everyone but the Herald; she's not in sight.

  
"Uh, no. Bad dream is all." The dream was actually going so well... "I'll uh..." I point towards the trees.

  
"Yeah, sure. Go ahead." The dwarf says then walks towards the fire. I'm still not used to this outdoors toilet thing but what else can I do? I just wish I could clean myself. And that includes brushing my teeth. God, my mouth feels foul.

  
When I'm back, I eat some oatmeal while listening to them talk. Sera apparently isn't so uncomfortable around me anymore but she still doesn't talk to me. Solas sure looks like nothing happened. Well, that's for the best.

 

...

 

Solas tries to keep his mind clear as they ride towards the Crossroads, they should reach it before noon but they will simply pass through. They have enough supplies to reach Haven and the Herald wants to get there as soon as possible. However, the girl in front of him, sitting so close to his body, occasionally rubbing against him as the horse moves, does not help keeping his mind off what happened in the morning.

  
He told her he would pretend nothing happened but how can he? What began as simple cuddling for comfort became some enthusiastic rubbing on her part. And she was calling his name, no, moaning his name. He can only imagine what sort of dream she was having. It would seem she not only has feelings for him but also desires him. If he were younger he would sure indulge her and make sure she had the best time, but he is not, and he will do as asked and pretend nothing happened, even if his body does not agree and he finds himself uncomfortably aroused and hoping she does not notice.

 

...

 

The sight of the Crossroads causes mixed feelings in me. This is one of the most important places in the game, where Mother Giselle is recruited, if I can call it that, and the Inquisition begins its work. To see it as something real makes this all the more, well, real to me. I'm really in Thedas, not simply somewhere in the wilderness of wherever. I shouldn't be coming to this conclusion now, after all I've been among the very people who make most of what I know as the Inquisition, but seeing this village enforces reality in a way their presence wasn't able to. So far I guess I still thought I could wake up at any time, but this world is physical, it's real, and I'm a part of it now.

 

Leaving the Crossroads behind, we stop for lunch by a river, and I'm dying to get in it. I notice I'm not the only one. Sera is already removing her clothes, making me wonder at propriety. The Herald also is removing hers and damn, Bull too! I immediately avert my eyes. "Come on, Tina, don't be shy." The qunari says and I bet he's smirking.

  
"I'm fine." I walk into the water having removed only the boots. And I definitely keep my eyes off Bull.

  
"You can't swim in that." The Herald says.

  
"I don't plan on swimming, just soaking." And I hope the clothes dry afterwards.

  
It's curious to see the party in the water. Solas joins us by dipping his legs up to his knees and sits on a large rock. I guess it would be too much luck to have him naked under broad daylight.

  
It's a hot day, and I couldn't be more glad to be in the water, specially after feeling so filthy. It sucks that I can't have a proper bath surrounded by people, but it's better than nothing.

  
I get out of the water after feeling as clean as I can under such circumstances and sit by the margin so the clothes can start drying. Were it not for the awkward morning I would have gone to Solas' side, but as it is I'm too embarrassed; pretending nothing happened still can't erase it from my mind.

 

When the others get out of the water and begin putting back their clothes, mine are still a bit wet. To my surprise, Solas dries them with a gesture of his hand. "Nice." I say in awe. "It would be nice if I could use magic."

  
"Magic is overrated." Varric says.

  
"Magic is dangerous!" Sera adds.

  
"It's useful, though." Bull says.

  
"Well, it's all that and more." The Herald says. "Let's move out."

  
And we do. I don't know if it's because I was in cold water until recently but Solas feels warmer than before. I wish he would wrap his arm around me again, but I guess that's too much to ask, specially after this morning.

  
"So, Tina," Blackwall says as he approaches on his horse, "is it true you know about the Inquisition and its people?"

  
"Yes. Some things."

  
"About me too?" Sera asks.

  
"A bit." The elf groans uncomfortably. "Red Jenny, doesn't like magic, nobles and elven history."

  
"Creepy."

  
"What about me?" Varric asks.

  
"How was it that you said it? 'Rogue, storyteller and occasionally unwelcome tag along.'"

  
"How..?" The Herald asks. "That's what he said when we met."

  
"I know."

  
"I regret asking. I'm not sure I'm comfortable with this. I tell people stuff, not the other way around." The dwarf says and I find myself laughing.

  
"We'll have a lot to talk when we're in Haven." The Herald says.

  
"We will, but I'm not telling anything about you guys, I know it's not fair me having this advantage."

  
"If you hold onto that I got your back." Varric says and if I could see him I bet he would wink.


	6. Kiss

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Cuddling, kissing and too much thinking.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Three days in Thedas and she is already kissing him. Is it too fast? I think Solas is having issues keeping her away and she wants him too much to keep her distance. Sleeping together doesn't help either...  
> I hope you like the chapter. ♡

This time when we stop for the night we have to set up our own camp, since according to the Herald we are too far from any scout's camp. It's curious watching the party setting up the small tents; I think the most they allow is a crouch. I hope Solas doesn't mind cuddling because it's the only way we'll fit comfortably. And I sure hope I don't repeat that shameful action.

  
After I'm done eating I decide to ask them because I can't stand this anymore. "How do you clean your teeth?" They clearly weren't expecting that question because they all look at me with funny faces.

  
"Well, there's brush and paste." The Herald says.

  
"In a pinch you can chew elfroot stalk." Varric adds.

  
"Hm. Got any stalks with you?"

  
"No, but it shouldn't be hard to find elfroot in the morning." The Herald answers then stretches. "I'm hitting the bedroll guys. Behave." I wonder what happened for her to feel the need to say that.

  
"Tina," Solas says from beside me, "if you'd like, I know a spell."

  
"Hoy, I wouldn't accept that if I were you, yeah? Your teeth might fall off."

  
"Ignore her, that would never happen." Solas calmly says.

  
"Can you really do that?" I do ignore Sera's comment. I trust Solas' skills. Solas nods and I open a large smile. My problem is solved! I'll have clean teeth again! "Please cast it." He takes his hand to hover over my lips and as a soft golden glow travels from his hand to my mouth I notice how beautiful his hand is. I wish I could kiss it and feel it touching me. My thoughts are interrupted by the refreshing sensation inside my mouth, somewhat like a breeze. Then he stops.

  
"Done." He says with a smile. I run my tongue on my teeth and it feels like I just came out of a session with the dentist. And my breath is fresh.

  
"Amazing..." I say in awe, with a smile I'm pretty sure is quite silly. "You're my savior. Tell me what you want in return and I'll give you."

  
"Your satisfied smile is enough reward." He shocks me, and a whistle coming from Bull tells me he also got that as a flirt.

  
"Smooth talker." I chuckle to try and hide my surprise. "I'll go to bed. You coming?"

  
"Oh I bet he wants to." Bull says and I realize what I said can be understood in a lewd way. I try to ignore it and continue towards the tent.

  
"I will join you shortly. I will set down wards."

  
"Alright." I say and crouch into the tent, where I remove the boots and lay down.

 

...

 

Solas tries to ignore both the teasing and his desires as he goes around the camp placing wards. It makes no sense that he should be attracted to the girl he knows for so little time, no matter how long he has been without company or how beautiful she is. The fact she loves and desires him also should not matter, he should not encourage her. Yet, he flirted. Foolish old man. He is too used to freely tease women, it usually works for his benefit and furthers his plans. But she has feelings and he should not play with her.

  
When he joins her in the tent, her form waiting for him is a trial he must overcome. She always looks at him with adoration and the sight of such pure feelings along with a sinful body urging him to lay down almost takes away his sense. But he finds control and simply lays beside her, his body bumping onto hers while he settles in the bedroll in such close quarters.

  
"It... it'll be easier if er... if we cuddle." She is right, and it is tempting. Being closer to the Frostback Mountains also makes nights cold, even with the fire burning outside. It is just for comfort, he tells himself before turning on his side and wrapping his arm around her, pulling her close. "I er... didn't think you'd do it."

  
"Why not?"

  
"You have your reservations and considerations." She is right and it surprises him she knows. She really must know much about him.

  
"I cannot argue against good reasoning, and this position offers many benefits." She chuckles and he wonders what could be funny.

  
"Indeed." She sighs and starts caressing his arm. Solas wonders if she is aware she is doing it. He does not plan on stopping her, however; it is, after all, a simple and harmless comfort. Soon her breathing becomes softer and he imagines she fell asleep. It is unfortunate he is not able to observe her dreams, he believes there are many things he could learn from them. Solas almost convinces himself to forego sleep in favour of enjoying her body against his, but in the end his weakening good sense wins and he goes to the Fade.

 

...

 

I don't remember my dream, and thankfully I didn't wake up rubbing myself against Solas, but I'm not sure how to feel about his very noticeable hardness against my butt. But my body knows, and I'm getting hot and well... wet. I've never been in this situation before but I wish I could fully enjoy it, that he would not reject me if I tried anything. But he probably will. I decide to stay quiet and enjoy the cuddling.

  
At some point he holds me tighter, and unfortunately I can't hold back a happy moan, causing him to immediately freeze. I try to salvage the situation by caressing his arm, and it gets me a sigh from him. "I apologize." He tries to remove his arm from around me, but I hold him.

  
"What are you apologizing for?"

  
"I did not anticipate the effects this position could cause. It has... been a long time."

  
"I know, and I... well, I don't mind it at all to be honest. In fact, I... well, feel flattered."

  
"This is unfair to you."

  
"What is?"

  
"You have feelings I cannot reciprocate having only known you for such short time, yet my body betrays my wishes to stay away."

  
"Well, cuddling is hardly a good way to stay away," I chuckle, "and I don't blame you or your body, vhe- Solas." As much as I'm afraid, I need to see his face when I say this, so I turn. I'm surprised he didn't take the chance to remove his arm from around me. Feeling my breasts against his chest and his arousal against my groin only makes me want him more. "But I admit I wish we could do something about it." And I wish I could understand his expression. Surprise was definitely there at first, but now I don't know if it's pain or desire. Maybe both, maybe guilt. He hasn't left yet so at least he's thinking. I try to be bold and touch his cheek, which definitely surprises him. Still, he hasn't left. I caress it with my thumb, and now I'm surprised because he closes his eyes. So beautiful. Oh god, how I love this man. I close my eyes and touch his lips with mine, a chaste little thing, but it's enough to make him gasp. I recoil, ready to apologize, but he pulls me back, moving his hand from my back to my head and kissing me. I'm definitely surprised, but so damn happy. I part my lips and before I have the chance, his tongue acts first, entering my mouth. I don't waste the moment, rubbing mine against his before sucking it. He groans and pulls me closer, and I find myself wrapping my leg around his. He pulls back then, I open my eyes to find him scared, there's no other word for it.

  
"I apologize." And he sits up.

  
"Don't. I should know better than to push you. I was selfish. I'm not sorry for kissing you, but I shouldn't have done it." I crawl towards the exit and pull my boots, not looking at Solas, for both his and my benefit. "I know you don't love me, but I wish... well, nevermind. I'll be outside."

  
I never thought he would answer my kiss, much less hold me that tight with such hunger. I guess he really is touch-starved. And I'm desperate for his attention. I sigh and look around, I'm alone. The sky shows the early colours of dawn, I guess the others are still enjoying their rest. I don't blame them, just thinking about getting on the horse makes my butt hurt. The fire is almost out, the wood feeding it is only a hand long now. I should add more wood, we'll need the fire for breakfast. So I take a branch from the gathered wood left at a safe distance from the fire and toss it in. The fire immediately licks its added fuel and the flames rise in strength. This is such a beautiful and dangerous thing, fire; much like the man I left inside the tent I guess. 'Play with fire and you'll burn yourself', people say; weĺl, I'm already burned and the only salve is more of him.

 

I stay alone for little time, Solas comes out and starts taking down his, our, tent. He doesn't look my way until he's done, and he seems still thoughtful. The noise seems to have awoken the others or at least encouraged them to come out, and they do so complaining.

  
"Silence, everyone." The Herald says. "It's good, we'll get to Haven sooner and you can go about your business."

  
"Thanks for the reminder, Herald. I can't wait to drink Flissa's watered-down beer." Varric says and I got no idea if he means it.

  
"What got you up so early, Solas?" The Herald asks. "Usually I have to wake you."

  
"I'd bet they had a lover's quarrel of sorts." Bull says.

  
"You okay?" Herald turns to me and it catches me off guard.

  
"Yeah?" I don't really know what to say. "We didn't fight or anything like that. Don't worry." She raises an eyebrow at me.

  
"Solas," her tone is quite firm, "you better not scare her away." Eh? "So, who's making breakfast?"

  
I tune out pretty much everything after that. Does she want Solas to keep me around? I thought I was sharing the tent and riding with him because I appeared in his tent, but... is it to use my feelings to leash me? Could... could Solas have agreed to that? Is his care a lie? No... no, he wouldn't do that. He may have agreed to keep an eye on me, but he wouldn't play with me.

  
"Hoy girl," Sera brings me out of my thoughts, "what do you see in'im? He's bald and is all elven glory and spirits."

  
"I like that and everything else." She is surprised by my answer and I think I managed to get her speechless.

  
"And you're not afraid of speaking your mind uh?" Bull says.

  
"My feelings are obvious, specially if you saw my arrival."

  
"Ha yeah, I don't think I'll ever forget that." Bull says and I still don't look at him. "Best thing was Solas' face. Completely confused. It's not often you see that know-it-all confused."

  
"I do not assume to know everything."

  
"You sure act like you know better than others, Chuckles."

  
"I-" he frowns, "I have seen things-"

  
"In the Fade", everyone including the Herald and Blackwall say almost in unison and I can't help laughing. And I laugh so much my belly hurts. Poor Solas, people do get tired of hearing about the Fade all the time.

  
"There is more to people and life than what you see in the Fade, Solas." The Herald says. Sure there is, but I don't think she'll ever understand what he sees there, having godlike control over it.

  
"For what's worth, Solas, I admire your brilliant mind and your thirst for knowledge."

  
"Yeah, she's blind." Sera says.

  
"Love blinds, Sera." Blackwall says.

  
"True, that. Nothing easier to fool than well, fools in love."

  
"Alright, breakfast's ready." Varric cuts in and offers me a bowl. I take it with a small smile. I guess I am a fool in love, ready to forgive whatever bad action he does.

 

I don't pay attention to what they say while I eat, and after I'm done I drink some water and go for a toilet break. Everything while thinking if I really should be like this, so... devote, so... forgiving. I love him, but love is more than accepting whatever the other does, is helping them see where they are wrong and sometimes even be hard so they learn. But considering how much he hurts, how much guilt he carries within, I can't think of anything else than to soothe him and offer support.

 

 

When we're on the horse, Solas wraps one arm around me, surprising me. Then he sets the horse to run, making me squeel in surprise. But then I see the others are also doing it. It's quite scary to be on a running horse, but I trust Solas to keep me safe. And to be close to him again is amazing.

  
"Why we're running?" I eventually ask.

  
"These roads are safe, and the Herald likes shortening the travel back to Haven." He speaks close to my ear because of our current situation and I feel a shiver. Then I remember the kiss and try to push it out of my mind.

  
"I wonder what they'll do to me."

 

"Questioning." Heh... I hope it's not the same as the one the Herald went through.

  
"Can you accompany me? I'll feel safer."

  
"I will try. Cassandra and the Spymaster may not agree."

  
"Then I'll tell them I'll only speak if you're with me."

  
"I would advise against antagonizing them."

  
"You're right. Well, we'll see."

 

 

Nothing remarkable happens during the rest of the day, aside from me getting cold. The closer we get to Haven the worse it is. My clothes are hardly appropriate for the weather, considering they're plain pajamas, but there's nothing I can do. Solas' warmth helps, but the cold wind while we run cuts straight throught the fabric.

  
When the colours of twilight announce dusk is near, I'm very cold and Solas offers to cast a warmth spell on me. Of course I agree, and I must admit the spell heats more than I guess it should have. If only Solas wouldn't reject me.

  
It's not long after nightfall that I see the lights in the distance, and for the first time, I'm scared.


	7. Questioning

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Tina talks to the advisors.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Wasn't sleepy so I wrote this chapter. I hope you like it! ♡

There is a loud noise which I assume is the horn signaling the arrival of the Herald's party, which is us, and I never thought I could become even more anxious. What will they do to me? Will they think I'm a threat? Will Cullen think I'm a demon or abomination? Will Leliana threaten me? Will Cassandra yell at me? I don't take yelling very well, I had a mean teacher that liked yelling and she made me miserable.

  
There are people gathering before we even reach the gates, and when we stop at the stables I see a large man with the unmistakable armor that belongs to Cullen.

  
"Herald!" He greets and approaches her. "We were not expecting you until tomorrow."

  
"Way back was clear." She says while coming down from her horse. Solas also dismounts and helps me down, which brings attention to me.

  
"Another agent?" The Commander asks and I look at the Herald.

  
"She might be." Herald says then starts taking her stuff from the saddle. "We need to talk first." Cullen looks at me so weird. "Summon the other advisors, Commander, we should settle this at once."

  
"Will do." He turns to the Herald and walks into the village.

  
"Tina, Solas, you two come with me." Oh, Solas is coming too, what a relief. I begin following the woman and barely notice Solas removing his pack from the saddle.

  
"Good luck, Dreamy!" I turn and see Varric waving. I wave shyly at him, hoping I don't end up needing luck.

 

 

The walk through the village is not as simple as it was in game, Haven is bigger and it's also very dirty in some places. I'm glad I'm wearing shoes. And I'm also worried about the hygiene in the place. I don't want to get sick... I wonder how much can magic solve.

  
There are people around even though it's night, some are clearly drunk. How can the Inquisition work with drunk people in its ranks? I hope they are off duty. And that they don't harass women and elves. The Herald is an elf, I wonder if she's assessing the issue. Although I don't think she has enough power at the moment.

  
When a large building covers everything ahead I realize we've arrived. The Chantry is pretty much empty, aside from three sisters walking around and then stopping to watch us. I wonder why people look at me as if I'm an alien if they don't know I am yet.

  
Herald leads us through a corridor then into a room, in there I see the advisors are already present, Cassandra too. They all look at me with curious faces.

  
"Welcome back, Herald." Josephine says with a smile.

  
"Thank you, Josephine. I want to introduce Tina," she points at me, "she appeared in camp a few nights ago." Leliana's gaze creeps me out. "Tina, I assume you know them?" I nod.

  
"Cullen, Commander of the forces; Leliana, Spymaster; Josephine, Ambassador; and Cassandra, Seeker of Truth." Josephine tilts her head, Cullen frowns and Leliana seems to be piercing me with her eyes alone. Cassandra seems confused. I wish I could hold Solas' hand for support, but I control myself.

  
"What do you mean 'she appeared'?" Cassandra asks.

  
"Exactly that. Solas, tell them what you told me."

  
"Very well. I woke up to find a mysterious glow inside my tent, which later materialized and became her. She is from another world."

  
"That is not possible." Cullen says. "She must be a demon."

  
"I assure you she has no relation to the Fade. She even told me it does not exist in her world."

  
"If this is true," Leliana says, "how did you get here?"

  
"I don't know. One moment I was in my bed, the next I'm in his."

  
"And she knows us all." The Herald adds.

  
"What do you mean?" Josephine asks.

  
"There are stories about this world in mine." I decide to explain. "I don't know how it gets there, or why what I know pretty much means I'm in your past."

  
"Past?" Cullen asks.

  
"If the stories are right, then I know your future."

  
"That is new information." The Herald says. "Why didn't you tell me that?"

  
"I wanted to explain it only once."

  
"Then explain." Leliana says, cold as ice, and I take a deep breath.

  
"It's long, do you want to hear it now?"

  
"Yes." The Spymaster says and I sigh.

  
"Alright, let me see. I don't know how I got here, but I know things that were told in stories in my world." I begin fidgeting the hem of my shirt. "The Herald woke up in the dungeon, accused of causing the explosion in the Temple. Solas helped her with the mark while she was unconscious, when Cassandra took her to the rift, she closed it. Then she slept for three days aftet closing the one at the Temple and people were calling her the Herald of Andraste."

  
"Did you tell her that?" Cassandra asks.

  
"Of course not," the Herald says, "and she even knew what Varric told me when he introduced himself." Cassandra hums but says nothing else.

  
"What about the future?" Leliana insists.

  
"That depends on what already happened, and certain things will need to be discussed carefully because they are very sensitive." I take a deep breath and decide to try holding Solas' hand, brushing my fingers on his. I'm relieved when he takes my hand. I notice Leliana noticed. "I know you recruited Bull, Sera, Vivienne and Blackwall. Have you been to Redcliffe yet?"

  
"Not yet." The Herald answers.

  
"Alright. There is a mage you can recruit there, he is very smart and very sassy." I chuckle at the memory of Dorian and Cullen clears his throat. "Sorry, well, there are some very bad things happening in there, if what I know is true."

  
"So you are not even sure what you claim to know is true?" Leliana asks.

  
"To me this was all a dream until two days ago."

  
"That's true. It was hard convincing her she was awake." The Herald says.

  
"Let me see if something else matches, I don't want to create a mess in case I'm wrong. Hmm. You recruited Bull, was there a group called Blades of Hessarian there in the Coast?"

  
"Yes."

  
"Did you get a necklace to challenge their leader and recruit them?"

  
"Yes..."

  
"Okay... did you see a dragon fighting a giant?"

  
"Er... yes."

  
"Hmm. What else... did you see a dwarven ruin with a locked door at the beach?"

  
"I did, yeah. Nothing will open that thing."

  
"You will probably only get access after going after red templars." I don't really remember at what point that thing unlocks...

  
"Red... templars?" Cullen asks.

  
"Templars corrupted by red lyrium."

  
"What?" He seems shocked and pissed.

  
"The one behind the explosion of the Temple is using red lyrium to control templars."

  
"That's madness!"

  
"If even true." Leliana says. I wonder how I can convince her... oh, the scout.

  
"Leliana, have you gotten news on Buttler?" Her eyes go wide then she squints threateningly.

  
"What do you know?"

  
"He betrayed you for some reason, got... what was his name... Farrier dead. You wanted to kill him. Did you stop her, Herald?"

  
"No. She knows what she does."

  
"So far the things you know could have come from a spy." Leliana says.

  
"Unlikely, but not impossible." Cassandra says.

  
"Hmm... I don't know how to be sure..." Another early side mission... "Have you been to the Fallow Mire yet? To rescue soldiers kidnapped by Avaar?"

  
"We were returning from there when you appeared." Oh. Shit... there's not much left... Of course!

  
"Your clan... has it contacted you yet?" She looks to the advisors.

  
"We got a reply from them two days ago, they need help." Leliana says.

  
"You have to be very careful, they are in a very delicate situation because a noble in Wycome is working for the man behind the explosion."

  
"Who is this man?" Cassandra asks.

  
"Corypheus. Hawke fought him and thought him dead. Before you think Varric has any blame, he doesn't. Corypheus uses the taint to become immortal, he can transfer himself to a blighted body."

  
"Blighted body..." she gasps, "but that would mean-"

  
"Grey Wardens are his favourite puppets."

  
"If what you say is true," Leliana says, "then it likely is related to the Wardens disappearance."

  
"It is. Corypheus is sending out a false calling, he has the Wardens desperate."

  
"This is too much at once," Cullen says. "Red templars, false calling, ancient darkspawn."

  
"We need proof she's telling the truth and that we can trust her." Leliana says.

  
"I don't know how to prove it to you in a simple way." And without compromising people's secrets. "Maybe... hmm... has Vivienne asked you to retrieve books, Herald?"

  
"I haven't spoken to her much. No."

  
"If you talk to her and offer to help the Circle, she will."

  
"Hm. I'll talk to her in the morning."

  
"That doesn't prove anything."

  
"Alright, listen carefully. Redcliffe is in some very serious trouble. Send a spy, confirm it. Fiona won't remember ever meeting with the Herald, there will be a weird rift right in front of the gates and the mages will be indentured to a Tevinter Magister called Gereon Alexius. If you confirm that, then what I know will be able to help you. And if those are true, get the Tranquils out of there, they are being killed for a ritual."

  
"If that is true..." Cullen says barely above a whisper.

  
"We don't know, Commander." Leliana says. "I will send a raven at once."

  
"I honestly don't know if I want those things to be true." I say. "If they are then I can help you, but they are awful things..."

  
"What is your relationship with Solas?" Leliana asks.

  
"I'm his friend." Herald snickers.

  
"Friends don't do what you did."

  
"I..." Solas squeezes my hand reassuringly and I continue. "Even though in my world he was merely a character in a story, I love him. But he's a friend, he barely knows me."

  
"What do you say, Solas?" The Spymaster asks.

  
"I believe her. She is no human of this world, she knows us all, she just proved to know events few people do, and if she's correct about Corypheus and Redcliffe she is a powerful asset to the Inquisition."

  
"Very well. We should meet again after I have news, until then you will stay with Solas." He stiffens.

  
"Heh, I've been letting her under his responsibility too." The Herald says.

  
"I'm not sure he wants to continue sharing with me."

  
"Are you her friend, Solas?" Leliana asks.

  
"I am."

  
"Then you won't mind looking out for her while we investigate, will you? Of course the alternative would be locking her in a cell."

  
"Leliana that is hardly necessary." Herald says. "She's been nothing but forward when asked questions and she's nice. She doesn't deserve the dungeons."

  
"I do not mind." Solas says before they continue arguing. "She's been good company."

  
"It's hardly proper though." Cassandra says.

  
"She loves him, Cassandra." Herald says. "And if you saw what I did you would want to help the girl too."

  
"What did you see?"

  
"I'll tell you later. I believe Leliana has ravens to send and I'm hungry."

  
"You can tell me over dinner if you do not mind."

  
"Of course."

  
"Then tell us over dinner." Josephine says, making the Herald laugh.

  
"You want in too, Cullen?"

  
"Er, no. Thank you, I have reports to go through." He's so red I doubt that's the only reason.

  
"Meeting's over then?"

  
"Yes, I will let you know when you'll be needed." Leliana says.

  
"Okay. Let's go, Solas. Good night, everyone."

  
He nods, and, without letting go of my hand, he leads me outside.


	8. Dinner

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Tina and Solas have a conversation over dinner.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you for kudos and comments! They brighten my day! ♡  
> I hope you like the chapter :3

"Are you really okay with me sharing your cabin?" I ask while we walk out of the Chantry. I notice people still looking at me as if I'm an alien. Do they know? Curiously enough, Solas is still holding my hand, and I really don't intend on being the one to break contact.

  
"Yes." I hum in thought. Maybe he got used to me and my touchy behavior? Or did the kiss change anything?

  
We make the rest of the way to his cabin in silence. I wonder what he could be thinking about this whole situation. I also wonder about food, just like the Herald, I'm hungry.

  
We reach the cabin and he opens the door, inviting me in after he takes a look around. I step into the place, that is only a room with a division at the far end. Flames come to life on a hearth in the middle and the warmth immediately makes me comfortable. Even with the spell, the cold outside was bothering me. He points to the bed and walks over to the chair by a small table full of books. "Sit. We must talk." He sits on the chair, facing the bed, and I sit on the mattress, relishing in its comfort. Can't wait to lay on it. Wait, we'll share the bed?

  
"Will we sleep together?"

  
"It seems that way. Unless you feel uncomfortable with it."

  
"More like I thought you would want to be away, you did say you wanted to keep your distance, I'm surprised you even agreed with Leliana."

  
"You know about me and important events, I need to know what you know. Making things difficult for you in the Inquisition does not help me."

  
"Right. I guess by talk then you want me to answer your questions now?"

  
"I do."

  
"Can I have some food first?"

  
"Of course. I will bring you food, feel free to explore the place." He stands up.

  
"Solas..."

  
"Yes?"

  
"Please don't be afraid of telling me if I'm bothering you. I don't want to impose my presence on you."

  
"I will let you know when it happens. I will not be long." And with that he leaves, and I'm left wondering if he's really okay with me. Well, he's not afraid of expressing his dislike so I suppose he's not simply being polite.

 

...

 

Her request surprised him; 'Let me know if I'm bothering you', but what surprised him was not the words, it was the fact he is comfortable with her presence. Perhaps it is her origins that makes him curious, or her feelings for him. She knows who he is and still understands him, there is comfort in that. But also danger should she decide to betray him. He must not lower his guard, love can turn into bitter hatred without much warning.

  
He knew the Herald would be in the tavern with the others, and he hoped she would be too busy talking to pay him any mind; that, however, is not what happens. As he orders a meal both for him and Tina, the woman calls him. "Solas! Where's Tina?"

  
"At the cabin." He answers while approaching their table.

  
"Oh, Cassandra was hoping to talk to her."

  
"Perhaps in the morning? She is not used to traveling and is tired."

  
"Oh." The Seeker says. "Is that why you're getting food for two?"

  
"Yes."

  
"Tell me, Solas," the Seeker continues, "do you trust her?"

  
"I see no reason not to. She seems genuinely interested in helping us. And she possesses knowledge of people in the Inquisition and instead of threatening or blackmailing she offered respect and secrecy."

  
"He's right," the Herald says. "She did say she would tell us everything she knows but personal information."

  
"I wonder what she knows," the Ambassador says. "The information she gave us is most troubling if true."

  
"And if she really has knowledge of the future and is willing to help, she is a blessing." Cassandra says and the Herald laughs.

  
"So if I'm the Herald of Andraste what does that make her? An outworlder at that."

  
"A Prophet? An Oracle?" Josephine says. "Titles can be discussed after we have confirmed her warning." Solas expected this development and does not approve of it.

  
"If I may make a suggestion," Solas says, "keep her a secret. She is defenseless and the Inquisition has enemies. Knowledge such as which she possesses can be used against us just as well."

  
"He's right." Herald says just as Flissa finishes setting up the tray with bowls and cups.

  
"Now if you will excuse me," he motions his hand towards the tray, "I must return."

  
"Of course, Solas. Good night." Cassandra says, followed by the others.

 

...

 

I wonder what I should tell him first. There are so many things, and none is easy. Well, nothing is easy when it comes to Solas.  
Going through the place as he suggested, I find clothes inside the cabinet. I hope Solas doesn't mind if I wear them, I really could use fresh clothes. I take a pair of pants and a tunic and set them on the bed beside me so I can wait to get his approval. He said he wouldn't take long but I think it's been over half an hour, I have no way of knowing but it sure feels that long. Oh, there he is.

  
Solas enters with a tray and before I can even get off the bed to help him with the door, he closes it with magic. "Here it is."

He begins placing the bowl and cups on the table and at least with that I can help. "Thank you, Solas." Table set, I sit. "So, what do you want to know first?"

  
I take the spoon and look at him. He seems... thoughtful, and without a word he sits on the chair opposite of me. "What do you know of me?" An easy one, considering.

  
"You're a dreamer, you can kill people in their sleep, you're thousands of years old and very powerful, but you're weakened now because you woke up a year ago from Uthenera." His eyes are wide but other than that he looks calm. "You created the Veil to stop the Evanuris from destroying the world after they killed Mythal, but with the Veil, the elves became mortal and no longer use magic as their nature and you hate yourself for it." I eat a spoonful of soup, finding it incredibly delicious, and continue. "Because you're desperate to fix the world, and because Felassan decided not to give you control of the Eluvians in Orlais, you let Corypheus take your Orb and now we're in this mess." He looks... furious? But he doesn't say anything. I hope he's not mad at me. Well, why would he be? Maybe he's mad at himself. I continue eating while I wait for him to say something. He drinks a bit from his cup and sighs heavily. He takes a spoonful of food and then sets his elbows on both sides of the bowl, entwining his fingers as he joins his hands before lowering his chin on them. He doesn't look at me though, he closes his eyes and then looks idly at some point on the table.

  
"You saw all those things in that game?"

  
"I did."

  
"Yet you are not afraid of me. You do not hate me for destroying a world and planning the destruction of another." Then he turns his eyes on me, and he is so serious that I almost feel afraid at this moment, almost. "How?"

  
"Er... you're a good man if a little stubborn, you don't want people to suffer, you want to help them. You had no way of knowing what would happen to the elves with the Veil, but in the game you said every other alternative was worse, so I believe you destroyed a world to save it. And I don't agree with what you did with the Orb, and honestly I'm glad it was to Corypheus that you gave it to, because if the person had died and you got the unlocked Orb this world would be an even worse mess now." He is definitely furious now, dropping his hands beside the bowl and I'm sure if he was anyone else he would've hit the table loudly.

  
"Of course you would think so, you do not understand what the elves have lost, how the people of this world are like Tranquil, with the Orb-" he pauses, "what do you mean 'if the person had died?'"

  
"Corypheus isn't dead. He cannot die if there's a tainted body nearby. And please, stop treating me as if I didn't understand shit or didn't support the elves. I may be human but I don't like how the elves are treated or what they've been through." He opens his mouth but I raise a hand. "And no, people are not emotionless beings like the Tranquils, they feel many things, they have a drive to live and achieve their goals. I don't know how life used to be without the Veil, but people aren't mindless neither emotionless. They may be awful at times, but that's because they don't know better and most times find themselves surrounded by awful examples. There are good people, in every race in the world. As you spend time with the Inquisition you'll see this, and I even think you already began to, you're just being stubborn so you don't give up on your plans." He tries to speak again but I raise my hand again. "No, I don't want to convince you to give up, I agree that the Veil needs to come down, but you need to really think things through. A very long time has passed, Solas, and both this world and the Fade have adapted to the Veil. Spirits won't know what to do and the people would wreak havoc in panic. The magic would alter landscapes once again. And then there are the Evanuris and Forgotten Ones locked away, they'd be free and the world would be in no shape to deal with them. Don't take desperate measures or you really will destroy the world this time." I take a deep breath and let it out in a loud sigh; this was intense, but I needed to say it. His entire face is contorted, I guess he pretty much hates everything I just told him, but he doesn't look furious anymore, it's more like he's deeply annoyed. Maybe he's being condescending and thinks I'm too foreign and ignorant to really understand the problem so he is annoyed that he had to listen to me. It would be nice if he understood he needs to prepare for taking down the Veil, specially if the Orb breaks as in game.

  
The silence is disturbing, but I don't want to push, so I resume my eating and wait. It takes a long while before he speaks. "You might be correct." I'm so surprised I almost let the spoon fall. "I should think it more thoroughly." He looks so sad it breaks my heart. His hands are clenched and he is staring at the bowl.

  
"Solas..." His eyes turn to me and I feel like I'm looking at a kicked puppy. "I know you want to rush it because you don't like what you found, in many levels, the elves being mortal can't wait too long either, but the consequences can be dire. Just... find a way in which the world you create isn't worse."

  
"What else do you know about Corypheus? I imagine he still has my Orb." I'm surprised by the change of topic so quickly, but he is a practical man after all.

  
"He wants to be god, and some people in Tevinter want to help him." Solas is finally eating again. "He is trying to form an army to conquer the world and he wants the Anchor. He sent a Magister who can control time to Redcliffe in order to secure mages and Lord Seeker Lucius is in reality an Envy demon who is turning the templars into red lyrium aberrations." And there he is, pissed again. "Did Lord Seeker hit the woman in Val Royeaux?"

  
"Yes." He says and sighs. "You... you wish to confirm the Magister is at Redcliffe, why? Do you not have enough proof that what you know is real?"

  
"I'm not really sure, and part of me hopes I'm wrong because if I'm right the future is ugly. If the Magister is there, then probably everything else I know is true and things must be done to save the people in Haven." He frowns and looks at me with a tilted head. "Corypheus will attack Haven after the Breach is closed, and he has an altered dragon." His eyes go wide.

  
"Altered how?"

  
"He stuffed the poor creature with red lyrium."

  
"What about my Orb?"

  
"In game it was only acquired after defeating Corypheus around a year from when the Inquisition started. But..." I take a deep breath.

  
"But?" He looks... eager? Oh Solas...

  
"It breaks."

  
"No... that... that cannot happen."

  
"There's time, maybe it won't break."

  
"It must not." He's so distressed. Oh vhenan...

  
"Anything else you want to know?"

  
"Another time. What you told me... they are terrible and I must think."

  
"Sure. You should do that while eating though. It'll help to think on a full stomach." He nods and resumes his dinner, as do I.

 

...

 

Solas does not know what to make of the information he just received. It would be one year for the possibility of having his Orb again, and should it happen as the woman says, he will never have it back. Something must be done to prevent it, the Orb must not break. Everything would have been for naught, all the deaths, all the suffering. No, it must not break.

  
He is not even sure why he believes in the future she knows of. Perhaps because she really knows about him. And to hear someone who knows what he has done, what he is capable of and what he plans on doing say he is a good person makes him feel even more guilty. She believes in him, but she should not. He does not approve of suffering, but that does not mean he would stop his plans if it was the only way. No, what must be done will be done.

  
"Solas..." Her voice is soothing and it annoys him, she is a complication. He looks at her and finds her sitting on the bed holding his clothes. What could she be doing with them?

  
"Yes?"

  
"Do you mind if I wear them?" Wear them?

  
"Why would you?"

  
"Well... you have more in there and I only have the ones I'm wearing..." oh, of course, "and they aren't exactly clean..."

  
"Yes, you can wear them. In fact, you should acquire more clothes in the morning."

  
"That would be nice but... well, I don't know where and I don't have money." Indeed.

  
"I will help you. The less exposed you are for the moment the best."

  
"What do you mean?"

  
"I mean people can be... less than gentle and you catch everyone's attention for being so different."

  
"Is that why people look at me weird?"

  
"I believe so. Your skin, your hair, even the shape of your face are unlike any I have ever seen. And I doubt those people have."

  
"Hmm. Oh! It's probably because of my grandmother's side of the family."

  
"How so? You said there are only humans in your world."

  
"And they are human, but different. We have many different types of humans. In the game I only saw three kinds of humans in Thedas, well, four. I almost forgot the Avvar. But you have white, black and Tevinter who I think would be my Indian or Egyptian equivalent." Solas wonders what kind of people those are, and hopes they are not slavers. "But in my world we have that and much more. My grandmother's side of the family is Korean, I got a bit of that."

  
"You are aware that I do not know how a... Korean looks like."

  
"Oh, right. Well, generally speaking they have dark straight hair, small and almond-shaped eyes with straight lids, not like yours with the crease, small nose and thin lips. Skin is a bit pale too." Solas can see some of those characteristics in her eyes and nose, but not in the rest of her.

  
"You are quite different from that description so I assume the other side of your family is also different." She chuckles, a sound Solas enjoys but he wonders what is amusing.

  
"Yes, my father, her son, told me it was quite the scandal back when she married my grandfather, eloped really. He was from another country and black. Dad said grandmother's family was one of those kinds that want to preserve the race, so they didn't approve. If you think I'm different you should see dad, he's unique." Solas notices the warmth in her expression and tone as she mentions her father, understanding she must like him considerably and likely misses him. "I don't think I've ever seen anyone like him, and mom's right when she says she's lucky to have him. Anyone would be."

  
"You sound very fond of your parents."

  
"I am, they're great."

  
"I imagine you miss them."

  
"I do." And as she takes her eyes away from him he notices she is trying to hide tears. "And I don't think I'll ever see them again."

  
"Do you really not know how you got here?"

  
"No... no idea." She rubs her eyes and laughs sadly, making Solas wish to comfort her, even though he is reluctant to do so. "But... well," she laughs again, still sad but her eyes seem brighter, "I got to meet you." He did not expect this. "Heh, I even got to kiss you. I guess I would die happy now."

  
"You should not jest about death, Tina." And with that her brightness fades. He wonders how his words could have affected her so intensely. He would apologize if he knew what for.

  
"You're right. Death is a scary thing." She takes a deep breath and sighs heavily, then grabs the clothes and stands. "I'll change so I'll be ready for bed."

  
Solas nods and listens to her light footsteps on the floorboard, tapping away into the hidden section of the cabin. He looks at his bowl, only halfway through the soup that is now cold. He sighs then warms it slightly with magic so it is not so terrible to eat. He misses more elaborate seasonings, but it is food and he is glad to have it.

  
It's not long before she's back on his bed, legs crossed in front of her. He cannot deny she looks adorable in his clothes, simple as they are they still are soft and comfortable and she seems to enjoy it greatly as she nuzzles the sleeves.

  
"Solas, what's this smell?"

  
"On the clothes?" She nods. "Embryum and lemon grass." She makes an adorable 'oh' and smiles, only to nuzzle the sleeves again. He cannot help a chuckle. At her confused expression he says, "I see you enjoy it." She smiles.

  
"I do. You smell wonderful and now I don't have to make you uncomfortable by nuzzling you. Heh... sorry about that by the way, I thought I was dreaming."

  
"You already apologized." He says with a gentle smile. "And I forgive you." He would even want more of that, but he knows he should not, and tries to remove the scene from his mind, unsuccessfully.

  
"Solas..." she asks after a moment of silence that allowed him to finish his dinner.

  
"Yes?"

  
"Do you mind casting that cleaning spell on my teeth again?"

  
"Not at all." He walks to the bed and sits beside her, feeling her soft breath on his hand as he approaches it to her mouth. When he's done casting she gives him a large smile, framed by soft lips he remembers enjoying not so long ago.

  
"Thank you, Solas. I'll uh... sleep now. Will you?"

  
He is torn between regret and delight as he thinks about sharing a bed with her again. And despite all his reasons to push her away, he finds himself wanting her close much more. He knows he should not encourage her, but he is weak, he has been alone for too long, he misses the comfort of a loving touch, and she wants to give it to him, she accepts him as he is, she loves him.

  
"I will prepare myself and join you shortly."

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I tried making Tina in The Sims 3, it's still not perfect but it's close. The hair also wasn't supposed to be thin dreads, it was supposed to be a very full curly mass, but this one's good, I guess her new life in Thedas will have her make the dreads anyway. At least the pajamas are accurate lol


	9. Vhenan

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Sharing a bed.

It doesn't take long for Solas to join me in bed, and we lay awkwardly facing up.The bed isn't very big so some sort of contact must be made, and he is trying not to touch me at all while not falling off. "I could lay the bedroll on the floor and sleep on it." I say and he frowns.

  
"No, you should stay in the bed."

  
"Then lay with me properly." Oh. "I mean, just, we can't sleep this way."

  
"You are right." He turns on the side and comes closer. I feel somewhat challenged to react, and I'm proud, so react I do. I turn to face him and we're so close I could kiss him if I just moved an inch. The proximity also allows me to feel him becoming tense, his eyes on me seem to search for something.

  
I decide to be bold and touch his arm with my hand, he sighs but otherwise does nothing. I take a step further and wrap my arm around his shoulder, he is frowning, likely arguing with himself about what to do with me. I remember the kiss, his hungry touch, and I want more of it. I know I shouldn't push, but if he didn't want it we wouldn't be in bed now, would we? I caress his nape and he closes his eyes; as I continue, his hand touches my hip, surprising me. He opens his eyes and I see he is conflicted, this guilty man in front of me doesn't want to risk. But that is all I want him to do. "Let me love you, Solas." He looks like an injured puppy and the sigh he lets out sounds enveloped in pain, ragged and tired. "Let me try to make you happy."

  
"How can you ask this?"

  
"Because you are everything." I move my hand to caress his cheek. "I want to be with you, wherever you go, love you and support you, pull your ear when you want to do something stupid."

  
"I don't understand how..."

  
"As I don't understand how I got here. But I'm healthy and I'm with you, my life couldn't be more perfect. Actually, it is only missing you accepting me." I give him a smile. "I know you have doubts, or we wouldn't be like this now. So... give me a chance."

  
"I do not wish to hurt you."

  
"The only way you hurt me is by leaving me, and I already know what you plan, who you are, so you don't have to leave me behind." I sigh. "Unless you don't want me near." And my heart wrenches at the thought.

  
"I want you more than I should under the circumstances." His words surprise me. I never thought I would ever hear him say them as much as I hoped he would.

  
"Then let's be happy together."

  
"Are you sure? My feelings, they-"

  
"They can come with time, or never. I know I'm being selfish, but I really want to be close to you."

  
"I would be the selfish one if I took advantage of your feelings for me."

  
"You wouldn't, because I know the stakes, I know where you stand, I'm not fooling myself."

  
"If you are certain." His hand caresses my hips over the pants. "What do you wish to do?" Heh, what a complicated question. I chuckle and he raises an eyebrow. "What is amusing?"

  
"I want many things, of very different types. You have no idea how many times I dreamed about this moment, how many things I imagined." He is surprised, but smiles. I love it when he smiles. "I love your smile. I wish you would do so often." His hand leaves my hip and cups my cheek.

  
"You are more than I deserve."

  
"Nonsense. I'm the lucky one."

  
"Debatable, but better left for another time. We should sleep."

  
"Can... can I get a kiss?"

  
"Yes." And he pulls me closer, touching my lips with his gently, but I want more and so I suck his lower lip. That turns the kiss into a very hungry one. His hand moves to my nape as his tongue explores my mouth, my hand runs down to his middle so I have enough purchase to move closer. This close to him I can feel his hardness against me and it ignites a fire inside my chest that spreads to my belly and lower. I end up moaning and he groans while kissing me even more hungrily. His hand grabs my butt and pulls me flush against him, and now I'm sure he's hard. He desires me. Solas desires me, it's not a physical reaction to a dream. Oh god, how many times I daydreamed about this, touched myself thinking about him.

  
I wrap my leg around his, feeling his length against my mound. Unfortunately the action makes him stop. "Are you sure?" Relief fills me, I thought he would reject me.

  
"I want it. But... I've never done it." He is surprised.

  
"You want me to be your first?"

  
"My first and only. I only want you, forever."

  
"Then I will take care of you." He's so gentle saying this that my heart warms up for a different reason now. Oh how I love him. I give him a smile.

  
"Please do."

  
He kisses me again, and while his lips move against mine, his body gently guides mine to lay back. On top of me, his hands travel around my arms, then down to my sides on the way to my hips. My hands hold his nape and shoulder, unwilling to separate our mouths.

  
I feel his hands sneaking under the tunic, moving it up as they rub softly towards by ribs. When his fingers touch my breasts I gasp into the kiss. He moves his lips to my jaw, nibbling as he makes his way to my neck. I can't help the sounds that come along the heavy breathing. This moment is so perfect, being with him, being touched by him. His hands on my breast squeeze lightly as he hums into my neck, his thumbs playing with my nipples send jolts through my body straight to my sex. Before I realize it I'm not only mewling, but also holding him so tight.

  
Soon his hands push the tunic up, and he pulls back to give me space. I let him slide it off me, baring myself for his eyes. And god, the way he looks at me makes me burn. He definitely likes what he sees. His eyes analyze every bit of my torso, and he takes one hand to touch my collarbone. His delicate fingers run over the skin, leaving a trace of heat in their wake as they explore.

  
I'm leaning back on my elbows, watching him discover me, and it's amazing to be the target of his admiration. His hand moves slowly to my breast, and I'm burning and almost panting in anticipation to have him touch me there again. "You are so beautiful." My heart is hammering inside my chest, and I bet he can see the movement, maybe even feel it as his hand moves downwards. And then his fingers ghost over the breast, almost tickling before he cups it. His large hand covers most of it and he squeezes again, making me gasp. His hungry eyes turn to me and I feel breathless as he watches my reaction while kneading the soft flesh. I lick my lips and swallow thickly, only to breathe hard through my mouth. I'm burning with desire and when he pinches the nub I let out a loud moan.

  
Solas moves his hand to my sternum and pushes me slightly, I get the message and lay down. Soon his mouth is in its place and he kisses his way down as his hands grab my sides, rubbing me as they move towards my hips. My hands caress his head and ears, often traveling down to his neck and back up. I wish he would take off his tunic already.

  
When his mouth reaches my belly I'm definitely panting, and his hands rub my thighs over the pants, only to go back up and grab the waistband. I'm a bit afraid, no, not afraid, insecure of being completely naked before him, but at the same time I want it so much. He kisses my hip bone as his hands push the fabric down, and then he sits back to slide the pants off my legs. I watch his eyes on my hips, on my thighs as the layer of clothing is removed. I bend my legs to help him get the pants off and he rubs the skin, squeezing it almost like a massage. A very tantalizing massage.

  
His hands rub his way up and when he gets to my naked thighs he stops and looks at me. My breath hitches and he gets serious. "Are you sure?"

  
"Yes. Yes." I'm so damn sure. He smiles, and the next thing I know is his hands back on my thighs, rubbing them inside and out to my butt.

  
His hands spread my legs a bit and I'm so damn wet I feel self conscious. "It seems you do desire this more than I thought." He says before his finger touches the outer lips, making me clench my walls in anticipation for more.

  
"You thought I lied?" I chuckle with boldness I didn't know I had. "I told you I thought of many things with you."

  
"Considering the way you woke up a few days ago I should not be surprised." He looks at me with a smirk, and then his finger slides into the folds, making me gasp. As he rubs his finger around I can't hold back the sounds of pleasure, and as much as I want to watch him I lay back and close my eyes.

  
"Oh Solas..."

  
"You are very sensitive." He says while continuing to rub. "And to think you are like this for me..."

  
"Yes, only you." Damn, it's better than when I touched myself.

  
"I think I can make you come just with this." I can't see but I bet he's smirking.

  
"As long as you don't stop at it."

  
"You would want more?"

  
"I want all of you. Ah! So good..."

  
Whenever he slides his finger to my entrance a very lewd wet noise is made. Along with my moans I bet there's no doubt to whoever would listen of what is going on here. The sweet scent also fills the air, and I'm so close. He barely even touched my clit, only nudging it slightly sometimes, making me even think it was on accident.

  
"Are you close?"

  
"Oh yes. Almost the-ere! Ah!" And sliding only a few more times he brings me to my climax, making me clench around nothing and buck my hips against his hand. All sense of space escapes me as pleasure courses through my nerves. His hand leaves me and when I open my eyes to watch him I see he is licking his finger. The sight causes a burning in my chest, he is so damn sexy.

  
"You are delicious." Oh damn you.

  
"And I'm horny again." He chuckles and removes his tunic in one swift motion, revealing his perfect torso that makes me gawk and swallow. "I missed your bare chest."

  
"You are free to touch it this time." He says with a smirk.

  
"You bet I will." And I take my hands to him, running them all over the surface of his smooth skin.

  
And then his hand is between my legs again, rubbing my clit this time. He sits back, which takes him away from my range, and inserts a finger in my entrance, slowly, making me gasp. "So tight..."

  
"Well, nothing's ever been in there before." I never had the courage to try a finger. His touch is careful, and it feels awkward to have something in there, but the more he pushes inside the deeper I want him, and when he pulls it out I miss it instantly. "Please don't stop."

  
"Tell me if it hurts."

  
"Alright."

  
I know I should relax, I've read and watched enough content to know this, and I do my best to. I'm also so wet that he slips easily, maybe I don't need to worry. His finger rubbing me and then pushing inside drives me into a chase, he tempts me with pleasure, intensifies it and then stops, making me desperate for more. And then before I know it he has two fingers in me. It burns a little, the way I stretch around him, but I want more so I don't dare ask him to stop. He seems to notice my discomfort though, and removes his fingers. I whimper at the loss. "Don't stop."

  
"Are you sure?"

  
"Yes. It's not painful, just... uncomfortable. But it's good too. Don't stop."

  
And then I feel him there again, moving in and out of me. The more he moves the better it gets, and it feels different than when he was touching me outside. Different, but amazing. I guess if he could touch me in both places at once I would melt away really fast. Whenever he touches a particular spot in there I feel like I'm going to burst. It's so damn good!

  
I'm being loud, but I don't know what I'm saying anymore. It feels too good and I'm lost in the pleasure. He knows what he's doing, every movement brings me closer and closer, my hands grab the sheets tight as I hear my voice mixed with the wet from my sex. "Solas! Ah! Solas, Solas! I... oh god-" And it takes me, my body moves on its own, flexing muscles and trembling while my nerves are hit by the strongest orgasm I've ever had.

  
Before I'm fully aware, I feel Solas moving around me, and when I realize it he is on top of me, watching. "Your pleasure is beautiful to watch." I don't know what to say to that. "Do you want to sleep?"

  
"No, I want to touch you. You barely let me."

  
"Then touch." He says with a smile and I do touch him, running my weakened hands on his shoulders and chest. He watches me and I watch him. I wonder what he thinks of all this. My fingers rub his hardness over his pants and he closes his eyes with a hiss.

  
"Let me see it." He gets up on his knees and begins undoing the laces. I watch anxiously, I've never seen one before, well, aside from books and videos, and it's **his**. I'm going to touch his most private spot, I'll give him pleasure, I'll- Oh god. It's beautiful. It's pale as he is, so hard and the swollen veins pulse so... magically. It calls me, I want to touch it and be touched by it. I swallow thickly and lick my lips, not even blinking. My hand touches it before I even realize I'm sitting up. It's hot, it throbs and the head is so red as the thin skin moves back. I move my hand and Solas gasps, I want to make him explode in pleasure. If only I knew how... When I feel his hand on my cheek I realize I not only lowered my head but I took it in. And it's great... oh god it's much better than I imagined. The taste, the texture, the girth, it's all perfect. Maybe one day I can take it all in. He doesn't let me suck for long though, he pulls me up.

  
"You don't want me to drink you?"

  
"Do you wish to?" His face is so flushed and cute.

  
"I want to give you pleasure, and I'm curious." His thumb caress my lip.

  
"I would enjoy it greatly." I smile, but before I can take him in again a thought hits me.

  
"If you... you know, come... can you do it again?" He raises his eyebrows and then chuckles.

  
"Why?"

  
"Well... I want to have proper sex with you... you know... your... er... thing inside me down there." He looks so amused that it only makes me feel more self conscious and I look down, at the mattress.

  
"You still want more?" I nod.

  
"Quite insatiable you are." His hand tips my chin up so I look at him. "There is nothing to be ashamed of, Tina."

  
"It's just... I don't know how to say it without sounding silly."

  
"You may say 'I want to feel you hard in between my legs, sliding in and out of me until we are both spent and unable to continue.'" He smirks and I'm breathless. That was hot.

  
"Yes... that... I want that."

  
"What do you want?" Let's see, I think I've read something similar.

  
"I want you hard inside me, sliding in and out until you fill me as pleasure takes you." He looks surprised, but that hunger is there.

  
"You want me to fill you?"

  
"I do."

  
"Then there is a spell I must cast." Oh, right. We don't want babies. I nod and he rubs his hand on my belly, I feel something weird.

  
"Solas... do you think it'll hurt?"

  
"Tell me if it does and I'll stop."

  
"But I don't want you to stop."

  
"I do not wish to hurt you. If it hurts we can try another time." I sigh. But the thought of him even considering another time makes me feel warm and safe, this won't be a one-time thing.

  
"Alright."

  
I lay back and he removes the pants before lowering himself on top of me, one of his hands hold my thigh and moves it so I'm more open. I decide to wrap that leg on the back of his thigh. The hand slides up to my butt and grabs it, helping him position himself against me. I feel him hard against my folds and I can't wait to discover how it feels inside me.

  
I caress his shoulders and the way he observes me makes me even hotter. His shaft slides between my folds, tempting me and making us both moan at the touch. Soon his lips are on mine, and my hands move, one to rub at his back and the other to hold his head as I kiss him.

  
When he moves his hips in a different angle I feel the head poking into my entrance, it's not the same as his two fingers and it surprises me at first. Then he pushes it inside and it begins stretching me, it's good and a little painful at the same time, but not enough to make me ask him to stop. "Don't stop, please." It feels amazing to be like this with him, our limbs entwined and connected, our lips touching and our breaths mingling. "Oh vhenan... yes... oh..." The kiss is messy while he moves, but we don't part. "This is... oh... so good vhenan... so good... ah..." God, I never thought this would be so good. And his sounds, his touch, the way he moves his hips, it all is amazing.

 

...

 

"Vhenan," she moans the endearment as naturally as breathing. Solas cannot deny hearing her call him her heart spurs him into more pleasure. He cannot remember the last time someone lay with him with such adoration. Her delicate body is so hot and smooth that he feels like never letting go. And she is so slick and tight, completely enveloping him inside her, providing pleasure he has not felt in a long time.

  
She loves him, she needs him, she wants only him, and she will be forever with him if he allows her. He wants to.

  
Her arms hold him tight against her body as he moves, taking from her lips the most delectable sounds as she approaches her climax. He is not far behind, having almost spilled inside her beautiful mouth. It has been too long, his endurance is not what it used to be.

  
Solas loves kissing and sucking her neck; the way her vein throbs faster as her pleasure intensifies, the sounds she makes, the way her skin reacts forming goosebumps, and the way she holds him tighter, her nails pushing against his skin. He wishes he could continue to move in and out of her for hours ahead, but the pleasure is already too much, his climax is imminent. But he wants to feel her squeezing him as she reaches hers, so he takes his hand to her breast, and as he plays with her nipple, getting the sweetest cry of pleasure she has given him tonight, he sucks and bites her neck.

  
Her actions under him are uncoordinated, her sounds are loud and Solas can already feel she is close, tightening her thighs against his hips. And then she lets out a soft moan before falling completely silent as her body trembles and he is squeezed tight by her pussy. If he was in better shape he could have fought the pleasure, but now he cannot, and he is taken by his own climax, filling her as she desires. His mind goes blank for a few seconds as pleasure courses through him, making him feel alive for the first time since waking up.

  
He opens his eyes and finds her looking at him as if he was the most precious thing in the world, it warms his heart in a way it has never been before. Her hands cup his cheeks and pull him close to kiss her, and he happily obliges. The kiss is gentle, she floods him with her love, and as much as he wishes he could continue, his body is becoming too heavy to support on his legs and arms, so he breaks the kiss and falls beside her, effectively slipping out of her. He already misses it.

  
Tina turns on her side to face him, her expression still blissful, and caresses his face. "That was amazing, Solas. Thank you." He is surprised by her words.

  
"Why thank me?"

  
"For giving me the best time of my life, for letting me love you." This girl is too precious.

  
"Tina, if anyone should thank another it is I. Your love for me, as difficult to understand as it is, ignited something in me that I thought lost. So, thank you."

  
"Oh vhe- Solas-" he interrupts her.

  
"You may call me vhenan. After tonight, there is no doubt." Her surprised face changes to a smile so large that Solas is afraid it could be painful. Her hug that follows is also unexpected.

  
"Oh vhenan... my dear vhenan." She says close to his ear as she is still clutching him. Solas decides to embrace her, and his heart has never been warmer. "Ar lath ma, vhenan." He is frozen for a second in surprise, but the effects the words have is so overwhelming that he can only bury his face in her neck and breathe deeply, pulling her even tighter to him. He is loved, he is accepted, he is weĺcome, despite everything.

  
"Ma serannas."

  
They stay like that for a few minutes, in silence, until she pulls away looking uncomfortable. "I... think I should go clean up."  
Solas knows how messy sex is, specially for the woman, and were he not so tired he would even enjoy the sight of his seed dripping out of her, and he would happily fill her again, and again. But he is tired, and he does not wish to part from her comfort. He pulls her back against him. "Let me cast a spell." She nods into his neck and he casts it, on both of them. The bed will have to wait until morning. "Let us sleep."

  
"Yes... good night, vhenan." He can definitely get used to this.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> God... how I envy this girl...


	10. About Redcliffe and Haven

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Meeting with the advisors to explain about the future of Redcliffe and Haven.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry for the wait. I hope you like it.

As I snuggle closer to the warmth beside me I try to hold onto the memory of my dream. Wait... dream? I take a deep breath, inhaling Solas' scent down at the crook of his neck and end up smiling as he holds me tighter in his arm wrapped around my waist. We're naked. That wasn't a dream. The slight soreness in between my legs also tells me it was quite real. God, I can't believe we did it! Solas accepted me! We... we did it! Hah, I got what Lavellan couldn't. A hum stops my giggling. "What's funny at this time?" Damn, he's so cute sleepy!

"Just a silly thought. Sorry to wake you." I say as I run the back of my fingers on his arm.

"It is early." He peeked at the window and I take a look too. It's dark outside.

"It seems that way." He closes his eyes again and burrows his face in my hair. "You're sleeping again?" He hums in positive and I chuckle. Cute. "Alright, sweet dreams." And I caress his scalp until I fall asleep again.

  
When I wake up again is to hasty and loud knocks on the door. Well, banging is more accurate. Damn it. I hate waking up to noise, and from Solas' reaction as he sits up I see he does too.

"Wait a minute!" He answers loudly but not shouting. The banging stops and we sigh in relief. We quickly wear back our clothes and I notice a small spot of blood on the sheets. Oh. "Do not worry about it." Solas says with a hand on my shoulder before pulling the covers over the spoiled fabric and breaking me out of my staring.

I sit on the edge of the bed and watch as he goes to the door. I can't believe it... that amazing man accepted me... embraced me... My thoughts are interrupted by the sight of Cassandra and the Herald. "Good morning, Solas." The Herald says with a straight face while the Seeker is frowning.

"Good morning, Herald, Seeker. How can I help?" Solas is so polite, but I can see he doesn't see the women as friends yet. He isn't warm with his words.

"I see we have awoken you," Cassandra says, "and I apologize, but we got news from Redcliffe." She stares at me then. "We need her in the War Room now for a meeting." She turns her gaze back to Solas. "You should join us, seeing you are the closest to her."

"I was hoping this would happen at afternoon at least." I stand and walk towards them, rubbing my eyes heavy with sleep.

"It's a pressing matter." Herald says.

"Yeah... I can imagine." I stretch my arms above my head and when I begin to fix my clothes I realize they're actually still Solas'. Well... whatever. "Let's go?" I ask the man beside me and he gives me a slight nod. Time to put on the shoes then.

Cassandra walks ahead in hasty steps, but the Herald makes sure to walk beside me. "So... you're wearing his clothes now aside from sleeping in his bed." She is smirking... god... "In my experience there is a lot of intimacy involved."

"Actually, just lack of clothes for me. Had to borrow." At that she seems to deflate. I don't know why I'm hiding it from her though.

"You're right. We forgot to give you clothes. I'll speak with Josephine and fix it."

  
When we arrive in the room, the advisors are already waiting, and they look absolutely intimidating. Terrifying even. "Please have a seat." Josephine says with a polite smile. Cullen and Leliana glare my way as I sit on a chair by the wall.

"I'm going to be blunt as this is urgent," Leliana says and I think it's the first time I see her so... serious and... well... she looks more like Cassandra than herself. "We got news from Redcliffe and it is as you've said. Now explain." I sigh.

"Very well." I take a deep breath, this will change everything. "You all should sit." They do. Solas takes the chair beside me and I'm thankful. "So... Fiona did meet you in Val Royeaux, but Alexius, the Magister who took control of Redcliffe, used time magic to go back in time and seize the mages."

"That's absurd!" Cullen says, and he was going to say more but Leliana raises her hand as a sign for him to wait. "You can't mean you believe this!" He says to her with a frown.

"Commander, I am willing to listen to what she says. So far she was right, and it gives us a great advantage if the rest of what she knows is correct too."

"But Time Magic? That isn't even possible!"

"Without the Breach it is impossible." I say, getting the attention back to me.

"The Breach?" The Herald asks.

"There is a man in Redcliffe, as I said before, he could be our ally. He wants to help us stop Alexius and close the Breach. He also helped Alexius develop the time magic."

"Are you sure of this?" Solas asks.

"Now that I know that it's happening here, I am. You all are not supposed to know any of this now, and it worries me that changing too much the outcome will remove our advantage of knowing the future."

"Time magic, predictions, this is giving me a headache." Cullen says with a hand to his temple. I wonder if it's not because of the lyrium withdrawal.

"I'm sorry." I say before I can even think. "I... know it's a lot. But if you can use my knowledge to your advantage we can help many people."

"Tell us about this ally in Redcliffe." Leliana says, and she still looks as if she'll burn me with her eyes.

"Alright. His name is Dorian Pavus, he is an Altus, and he used to be a student or something under Alexius back in Tevinter some years ago. It was then that he helped with the time magic, but it wouldn't work. Alexius also tried going back to a time before the Breach, it can't. It seems the power of the Fade leaking from the Breach is what allowed it to work."

"Is it true, Solas? Would that explain it?" Cassandra asks.

"It makes sense. There is much power surrounding the Breach, even stable, which would give him the necessary power to perform the magic. I am not, however, familiar with that type of magic. It is impressive that it was accomplished."

"You can discuss it with Dorian after the Herald recruits him." I say.

"I'm recruiting him?"

"We need his help to stop Alexius. The magic he used is disrupting the Veil and the timeline in that area, Alexius must be stopped.

"Why would he do this? Is Tevinter attacking Ferelden?" Cullen seems less confused and more focused now.

"No. Tevinter doesn't have anything to do with this. Some of it's people do. They are called Venatori, they are some sort of cult that worships Corypheus."

"What is that darkspawn intending to do? Destroy the world once and for all?" Cassandra asks.

"Corypheus feels betrayed by his gods, so he wants to become one. He is the one who created the Breach, so he could enter the Fade, but the Herald got in the way. He wants the mark back, and he will come for it with an army."

"An army? Against Haven? We cannot defend against an army." Cullen says a bit desperately.

"No, we can't."

"But now that we know we can prepare." Cassandra says.

"There's more to this." Leliana glares at me. "You don't want us to defend Haven." I sigh. This shouldn't be me to say. I look at Solas and he looks curious.

"After the attack, when the Inquisition is fleeing through the mountains, Solas would tell the Herald about the existance of a fortress where the Inquisition could make it's new home." They all look at him. Sorry...

"Perhaps I would find it in memories in the Fade while walking in that area." He supplies.

"Oh, right. You dream of memories." Herald says. "That is a useful one though."

"The place is called Skyhold and it's there that the Inquisition will be the most powerful. Haven must fall, but it doesn't mean we have to lose people as we would if caught by surprise."

"You want us to make evacuation plans." Cullen says and I nod.

"Corypheus also has a blighted dragon." They all gasp. "That is the main reason we can't defend the village. The trebuchets are our best defenses, creating avalanches to swipe down the army while our soldiers defend inside the village."

"Why not simply leave?" The Herald asks.

"She said Corypheus is after the mark on your hand," Leliana says, "he would simply follow. If we fight and bury them as she suggests we deliver a blow which he will need time to heal." Herald nods in acknowledgement, but then freezes.

"Wait, I'll have to fight it?"

"Yes, but we can make sure you escape." I say. "Facing him will also give you fame and power necessary for the Inquisition to grow."

"This is overwhelming. Can we talk about that later? What should we do about Redcliffe?"

"Alexius will bait you into a meeting with him in the castle. You'll go, accompanied by two more companions of your choice." She frowns. "Leliana will infiltrate soldiers through that secret entrance the Hero of Ferelden used." The Spymaster's eyes go wide. I take a deep breath. "Dorian will help you. But Alexius will go desperate and use the magic on you, sending you to the future."

"Wait... what?"

"I... can't say what you'll see there since I'm changing history by telling you what happens, but it should be terrible."

"No... I mean, you want me to purposely go to a trap and be sent to the future?"

"Yes. It's important knowledge you'll find there and if we change events I can't help you."

"This is insane!"

"I imagine it must be hard..."

"Are you sure this is the best course of action? That is too dangerous." Cullen says.

"I'm sure. It must happen. But I think it's best if you don't tell anything to Dorian until you're back from the future. He may not act in time due to anxiety or something if he knows. Then... I couldn't help anymore and you might even become trapped in the future."

"Alright, not telling Dorian anything."

"Now," I take a deep breath, "yesterday I said there were red templars." That focuses Cullen even more. "The Herald should help the mages and free Redcliffe because we can save almost them all, many Tranquils probably already died." I sigh. "But the templars... even if you go there many will have already been killed or begun transformation."

"You mean the entire Order is lost?!" Cullen is clearly angry. I haven't seen him angry often in game and here it's worse.

"No. Some still can be saved, I just don't think we should abandon the mages for them." He squints at me.

"You support the mages."

"I do. I don't think they are treated fairly. Of course that is one of the reasons I want to save them, but I'm being reasonable. Saving the templars affects some of them and dooms the mages into slavery and blood magic sacrifice. Saving the mages you free a village and only dooms the rest of a group that is already doomed."

"She's right." Leliana says. I continue before someone else can speak.

"You could, however, try to contact Ser Barris and help him evacuate good templars out of there."

"He is a good man, but what do you mean 'good templars'? They're all-" Cullen speaks but I interrupt him.

"Many there harbors hate and prejudice towards mages or lust for power. You can't be blind to that..." He sighs.

“What about the Lord Seeker? He was leading the templars, we should warn him!" Cassandra says.

"He... isn't himself anymore. He acted suspiciously in Val Royeaux, didn't he?"

"Man was crazy," Herald says, "I mean, I wanted to punch that old woman too but actually doing it? In front of that many people? Crazy."

"He is an Envy demon now." Cassandra gasps. "You would discover it if you went there instead of helping the mages."

"That is not how the Seekers should be..." her voice is so sad as she looks at the floor. Cassandra is so shocked I feel bad for her.

"If it's any consolation, Cassandra, you'll have the chance to rebuild the Seekers as something good again." She raises her head to look at me.

"When?"

"In time we will find the location of the remaining Seekers, then you'll have your chance."

"More things for the future." Leliana says. "How far into the future do you know?"

"Uh... roughly three years?"

"We should discuss more another time then, it is too much information at once." She continues. "We should focus on Redcliffe and the preparations for Haven's defenses."

"My advice for Redcliffe is act like you know nothing. Don't confront Alexius without Dorian nearby, you really need his help. Recruit people if you can, and take the Tranquils out of there if you find any."

"My reports didn't mention many in the village, but there still should be a handful." Leliana says.

"There should be a locked cabin by the docks with a tome on this ritual the Venatori has been performing on the Tranquils and... er... many skulls..."

"Maker..." Cullen barely whispers.

"From what I know," I look at the Herald who is quite pale, "you'll go into Redcliffe, attempt to talk to Fiona, she'll tell you she doesn't have the power to make any decisions anymore and will ask for Alexius. You'll talk to him and his son will fake being faint so he can slip you a note. The note is to warn you against his father and tell you to go to the Chantry. That's when you'll meet Dorian and he will charmingly explain things. You shouldn't act against Alexius yet, the Magister will contact you with an invitation to the castle. That's when you'll spring the trap."

"And be sent to the future..." She shudders.

"Why would the son betray the father?" Josephine asks, reminding me she's in the room.

"Just like Dorian, he doesn't agree with Alexius' plans or involvement with the Venatori."

"You seem quite fond of this Dorian." Leliana points out.

"I am. He is a great ally to have, is quite adorable and intelligent."

"Careful, Solas, or you'll lose her after I return from Redcliffe. You should accept the girl while she still wants you." Herald teases and I laugh.

"I... have accepted her." Herald's and Cassandra's eyes go wide and my heart beats faster as I blush.

"Congratulations, Tina! You got your man!" Cullen clears his throat, gaining a glare from the Herald. "Cullen, just 'cause you're frustrated and shy doesn't mean you should spoil girls' fun." He seems equally annoyed and embarrassed.

"Far from that, Herald, I merely believe this isn't the time or place for such conversation."

"I must agree." Leliana says. "Is there anything else we should know about Redcliffe?"

"Hmm. Be careful with the rifts in that area, they have pockets that speed up or slow down time, affecting you or the enemies."

"Just what I needed, a special rift to deal with..."

"It should be more than one, actually. Alexius can open them." She groans with a hand to her head, massaging her temples. "I... think that's all about Redcliffe, if I remember anything else I'll tell you."

"Then about Haven." Leliana says and I sigh.

"Corypheus should attack during the celebration for closing the Breach."

"So I will close it?"

"Yes, with help from either the mages or templars."

"At least some good news..."

"Roderick, the... Chancellor? He knows a pilgrim's path off to the mountains, it is perfect for the evacuation."

"Oh, something good will come out of him at last." The Herald says, gaining smirks from all the advisors. I can't help a small giggle.

"With time to prepare we should be able to save everyone. The army will overrun Haven, the dragon will burn buildings and anything else in its way."

"How am I supposed to confront that... Cory... Coryphis?"

"Corypheus. Well... in my story you go to the last available trebuchet to ready it for a final avalanche that will bury Haven, sealing the evacuation route so enemies can't follow, while at the same time baiting Corypheus."

"You want us to bury Haven?" Cassandra asks.

"It does sound necessary." Cullen says. "We cannot keep away such massive force otherwise."

"Just... how exactly am I supposed to survive that? Because I do, right? You said I go to that fortress."

"There should be a rotten plank near the trebuchet, so it breaks when you jump away to escape Corypheus and the avalanche. You'll fall into a mining tunnel that leads off into the mountains too. But it's a hard journey back to where the others will be camping. We could prepare something you so you don't have to struggle."

"Where is this tunnel?" Cullen asks.

"Haven is much bigger than I was described, but maybe I can find it. Is there a trebuchet inside the village walls?"

"Yes." He stands up. "Show us the tunnel."


	11. Trebuchet

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Checking the trebuchet and talking.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Here is another chapter! I hope you like it!  
> Thank you for comments, kudos and I realized I also got many subscriptions and bookmarks! I never noticed those and it's amazing! <3

They lead me to the trebuchet inside Haven's walls, and I can't _not_ point out that they need to reinforce those walls. "Really, the amount of people coming at us will be too great, reinforce them as best as you can. I know the Inquisition probably doesn't have much money at this point, but the better the walls, the better our chances at saving people. We'll need to fight them for some time in order to draw Corypheus out, and our forces will need the protection of the walls in order to last longer. Use the recruits if you have to, Cullen."

"I still cannot believe this." Cullen says.

"Well, let's search for a hollow spot... around..." I look at the base of the trebuchet and count a few steps to the right, "I think it should be around here..."

It takes us a few minutes to finally find the spot, it wouldn't break so easily so I suppose what makes it break in the game is actually the fight that happens prior to the launch of the boulder into the mountain. So many people walking around and fighting would weaken it. And a dragon landing nearby too...

"Now we know where it is!" I say, triumphantly. They look at me as if they had finally realized I knew what I was talking about. That means they no longer look at me as if I'm nuts, but that also means for them that Haven will suffer. "So... it should be a tunnel leading out into the mountains."

"And I'm supposed to fall into it?" Herald asks.

"Yup. And hopefully this time you won't be too hurt and you'll be prepared for the demons in there... actually... I don't know if the rift isn't _already_ in there... you should check that."

"A... rift? Under Haven?" Cassandra asks.

"Yeah."

"Maker... we are lucky it never caused trouble." Cullen says.

"Maybe it's not there, or maybe it's dormant. Like that first rift at the Breach."

"If there's a rift here we should close it." Cassandra is so serious, well, she should be. I look at the Herald, she's the one with the mark.

"Alright." Herald sighs. "Let's get down there. We need to clear the way first, though."

"I can help with it." Solas says from beside me, then I feel his magic taking the pieces of wood from the hole, and not satisfied at that, he makes a ramp with the planks.

"That's great!" I say as I look at the result. "Tell me why you have people suffering to build things when you could have mages do it in the blink of an eye? Oh right, you're afraid of mages."

"And we have reason!" Cullen says but I can see Cassandra is just as offended. They don't even have the _right_ to feel offended.

"Your reasons are just as bad as your prejudice. But we should discuss this another time, I think you have a rift to check."

"You mean you're not coming?" Cassandra asks.

"Me? I can't fight or did you forget? From what I know it should just be a simple tunnel, it doesn't split or anything."

"Alright, but you stay here." The Seeker insists and I nod. "Herald, let us investigate this."

"Yeah. You, Solas, Cullen wanna come too? It would be nice to see you fighting." I see the Commander blushing a bit.

"I will join you, I want to see this with my own eyes."

And with that, following the Herald whose name I still don't know, they go into the tunnel and leave me behind. I sit on a crate nearby and wait for what feels like an hour. It's boring, it's very boring. I see people walking in the distance, sometimes one or another looks my way in that curious and weird way of theirs but they don't come close. I wonder if I look really that different to them. What gossip could they be spreading about me? I wonder what the Inquisition will even do with me, what they'll tell people about me. I like Solas' idea of not calling attention to me.

 

When they finally emerge I'm laying on the crates in a very clumsy way, because well, those crates weren't made for laying on them; it was almost impossible getting comfortable on them. Staring at the Breach for so long also might not have been very wise since now I'm seeing things a bit twirly.

"You were correct." Solas says as he steps out of the hole first. "There was a dormant rift in there."

"And it was a nightmare to close it." Herald says, clearly annoyed as she comes out secondly. "How would I even close that thing alone _and_ injured?"

"Well... in the story you would have a... new power with the mark." She perks up. "It lets you use the rift to suck the demons back into the Fade, or at least hurt them enough to make the job of dispatching them more easily."

"Oh? That's handy. Do you think I could have used it now? You should have told me about it."

"I forgot, sorry. But I think if you could the mark would have reacted somehow, at least it did in the story. Maybe... maybe it's something Corypheus does with it when he tries to steal the mark from you that awakens that power."

"Interesting." Herald says as she looks at her hand. "Another reason to face that monster. But I'm not looking forward to it."

"I don't think anyone would be..."

"There is an exit on the other side as you said." Cullen says, interrupting our talk.

"Good. It would be nice if you could scout that exit to the one through the Chantry, provide support for the Herald when she escapes through this one."

"You have thought this through." Cassandra says.

"Not really... well, I don't think so. I just... read this story too many times." I guess I should not tell them it's a game. "And I've talked about it with too many people, there are many points of view, strategies people would have liked to see in the story and things like that."

"It seems our lives are famous where you come from." Herald says, surprised.

"Very. Some people more than others, but yeah, you're all pretty famous."

"What do they think about me?" Herald asks, crossing her arms in front of her chest in what I think is a defensive gesture, but she's not defensive in her tone.

"You're the hero." I shrug. "But they like the Hero of Ferelden more, I guess."

"Hard to compete with saving the world from a Blight uh?" She snickers.

"Hey, you're saving the world from the Breach."

"So I really do it?"

"Yes. It's hard, but you do it. And well, we should be careful not to stray far from the story, or our advantage is lost." I don't think it's ever too much to repeat this.

"We have many preparations to make in Haven while you go meet with the Magister." Cullen says.

"That you do, Commander. But you can do it." Herald says, getting Cullen red once more.

"So uh... breakfast?" They look at me with funny faces. "What? Cassandra and the Herald took me straight from bed. I haven't eaten anything yet."

"Yeah... that's right." Herald says, a bit sheepishly. "Let's go to the tavern then, we can find out more about you there, make things even, since you know so much about us but we don't know anything about you."

"Uh... alright." I look at Solas and he nods. "Let's go."

 

The tavern is crowded, I see Varric in a table with the Iron Bull and Sera. In a table beside them is a large group of loud and eccentric people who I'm pretty sure are the Chargers. Now that I'm here I'm not so sure anymore I want to be here. I don't know if it's because he is with the Qun or if it's his size and horns, but Bull scares me, and I don't want him knowing about me... I mean, more than he already knows. Shit... has he told his people about me already? Will he ever do it? He would definitely do it, wouldn't he? "Are you well?" Solas asks from beside me.

"Just... worried. What if Bull tells the Qun about me?"

"Leliana checks all the messages he sends them." Cullen says.

"I'm still sure he has ways of communicating with them." The Commander frowns at my words.

"Is this something you know?" He asks in hushed but firm tone.

"In a distant future... there is a _chance_... it may not happen."

"And if it does?" Cassandra asks, as serious as she was when interrogating the Herald.

"Herald kills him. Nothing else."

"How can you know **options**?" Herald asks and Cassandra nods as if realizing that is a great question she let slip away.

"There's this thing with the story of this place... nothing is really set in stone... we can see different outcomes."

"What a marvelous way of telling stories!" Cassandra says, but then clears her throat and gets serious again. "And what will cause this... choice of his?"

"I think we should discuss this another time, this is not really a good place." We're still standing by the door with people coming in and out, looking at us. I'm surprised Varric and the others haven't at least shouted a greeting or something. "Just know that the Qun will offer an alliance with the Inquisition at some point."

"Alright." Herald says, pulling my arm and making me move towards the opposite side of where Bull is sitting. "Normally I would sit with the guys, but we can sit over here. Flissa! Breakfast for all of us!" She pushes me lightly towards the bench against a wall. "Go on, sit down." I look at Cullen and Cassandra sitting on the opposite side of the large table, and Solas going around to sit on my right. I sit down on the middle of the bench and Herald sits on my left.

"Josephine would like to be here for this." Cassandra says.

"Oh, that's right! Leliana probably will kill us if we talk to Tina without her here to hear it first hand." Herald says and Cullen takes his armored glove to his forehead. I think he has been between these two for a long time. Solas seems neutral.

"I will get a messenger to them." The Seeker says and quicker than I thought possible she gets up and walks towards the door. Before I can even say anything she is back inside the tavern.

"She's fast." I end up saying, in awe.

"She is. Don't let her armor fool you." Herald says. "So... you and Solas?"

"Shouldn't she wait for the others before answering your questions?" Cullen asks.

"Oh, bummer."

"They should be here soon." Cassandra says as she sits down.

"Are we safe to speak here?" I ask.

"Ever heard of hiding in plain sight?" Herald says with a smirk. "And I think people need to see you as someone who can be trusted if you're going to help us, and you being around us gets you that image."

"Er... why?"

"Right now they don't really know what to make of you. You look too foreign." Cullen says as if it should have been obvious.

"I don't think I'm that different. I mean, despite the hair I think I could be similar to Vivienne?"

They look to each other then shake their heads, giving me a unison "No."

"Well... at least I'm not a mage, I guess they would panic then if I were."

"Probably." Cullen says with a solemn nod.

Flissa begins bringing bowls of what looks like oatmeal with cookies; I see she has two more trays to bring over. "Good morning," she greets as she places the bowls in front of the Herald then in front of the Seeker. She lets a jar in the center of the table and goes back to fetch the other tray. Soon we each have a bowl and a cup, and as I investigate the taste of the food -confirming it is oatmeal, and with honey, the Spymaster and Ambassador enter the tavern. After a quick glance our way, they come over to sit with us; Leliana on Cullen's left and Josephine on the chair close to the Herald.

 


	12. More Revelations

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Tina talks about herself, the future and the past.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm sorry about the wait, I got sick. I'm still recovering but I'm better enough to write again.  
> I hope a bigger chapter makes you happy :) And I hope you like it, of course xP  
> Thank you for comments, kudos, subscriptions and bookmarks, it's amazing to know the story is liked <3

Soon after the advisors are sitting around the table, a few scouts -if their armor is indication- and a handful of soldiers, the first cheering the latter loudly, enter the tavern. Then a few of the people who were already drinking join them. The bard starts a more animated song while one of the scouts sing along and claps. I doubt this is a coincidence. "I assume the sudden celebration is to cover our talk?" I ask Leliana, who gives me a smile. Of course.

"I am aware of your concern and do not worry, I have taken precautions, more than simply this... diversion." The Spymaster says.

"I hope your precautions involve keeping everyone in the Inquisition in check, because we're going to have spies in it, if we don't already have."

"That is a possibility that never escaped my mind. And we had a recent incident, as you well know."

"Yes, and I'm sorry, I know he was your friend, but as the Inquisition grows it'll be more difficult to check on people. And a few years from now, the Qun _will_ attack, they'll have spies in the Inquisition and it won't be just Bull. If he's not with the Qun by then he won't even know about the invasion, and if he is, well, he won't tell us."

"He may not be?"

"He may not, it... as I told them before you got here, there is something that can change his life, at some point the Qun will offer an alliance with the Inquisition, something happens then that may cause him to leave the Qun."

"Shouldn't we just remove him from the Inquisition?" Cullen asks.

"We knew he was Ben Hassrath when we recruited him," the Herald says, "might as well keep the advantage of knowing."

"Exactly what I was going to say." I say and Leliana simply nods.

"Now tell us about you." Herald says with a smirk.

"Right." I notice Josephine has her quill ready. Oh well. "Where should I start? Hmm. My name is Christina Wang Francis. I'm-"

"Wait, your name is Christina? I thought it was Tina." Herald says.

"It was shortened at some point by my parents and friends at school, it stuck." I shrug. "I'm nineteen years old, blood type A positive-"

"Blood type?" Cassandra asks, worried. Er... right... they have a thing with blood.

"It's a way to tell if people are compatible? When donating blood or..." if I say body parts I think they'll go nuts... "You know what? Just forget that part?"

"Why would you _donate_ blood?" Cullen asks, suspicious.

"Look, we don't have magic, so don't worry about blood magic. It's just a medical thing. Science." I notice Solas at least looks interested, and Leliana too.

"You're nineteen uh?" The Herald says with a smirk. "Only a year younger than me." I wonder when people are considered adults here.

"I'm an only child, not that it would matter since I came here alone anyway." I continue.

"Do you want to go back?" Herald is full of questions it seems.

"I don't think I _can_ go back. But..." I think back to the moment I was told I didn't have much left to live. "No." And I look at Solas. "I wouldn't have him there."

"Since you mention it, how did this happen anyway?"

"What happened?"

"You," she points with her head at me then him, "loving him."

"Well, I guess I got too into the story." I end up smiling.

"And you accepted her feelings, Solas?"

"I did." He holds my hand under the table, surprising me.

"He was so reluctant, you must be quite... persuasive." Herald smirks.

"I guess I must be..." I think I'm red.

Herald lets out a loud sigh before she takes a long drink from her cup. "If only I could be that persuasive with Varric." Wait, what?

"You love Varric?!" I ask and she spits out her second attempt at drinking.

"What? No!" She wipes her mouth with her hand while Cassandra, Leliana and Josephine laugh. "Hey, don't laugh!" And that only makes it worse.

"She has been trying to convince him to bring one of his friends over." Solas says, calmly.

"Hawke's friend, the former slave." Cassandra says, calming down from her laughing.

"Yes!" Herald seems still annoyed at them laughing at her.

"I met the man." Cullen says. "He was hot blooded, but fair."

"Fenris is adorable." I end up saying, getting wide eyes from the Herald and interested hums from the others. "What? I know him too, from the stories."

"Oh, right! You know Varric too! You probably can convince him for me."

"But... adorable?" Leliana says.

"Well, before I met Solas he was my favourite. Not that I loved him though."

"You seem to have a preference for elves." Josephine points out.

"Who doesn't?" I chuckle. They look at me with surprised faces again. "Well, sorry it's just... ah nevermind. There is only one that I want anyway." And I look to my side to find Solas serious. Hmm. "Well, Herald, I'll try to convince Varric to bring Fenris."

"I'll do anything for you if you do."

"Anything?"

"Within reason?" She offers and I laugh.

"I don't even know what I would want, what I wanted most I already got. But I'll keep it in mind."

"Do you have any skills?" Josephine asks, scribbling.

"Uh... I don't think so? I used to be good at sports, but... then there was the accident and I... couldn't play anymore. I'm afraid the only thing I can offer the Inquisition is the small knowledge of the... story."

"What sort of sports do you have in your world?" The Ambassador's interest seems peaked. "The Herald mentioned you do not ride so it could not be joust."

"No." I don't even think people do that anymore? "There are sports with horses but I didn't do those. I raced, on foot, with and without obstacles on the track. I liked to play volley too," she opens her mouth but I continue "I don't think you have it here. Do you have any sports with balls?"

"Children's game." Cullen offers. "It is some form of tag, but with a small ball." Dodgeball? Hmm.

"Volley is played with two teams, each on opposite sides of a net. I don't suppose you want to listen to the rules?" Cullen seems interested, as does Josephine, oddly enough. I thought she liked more... tamed activities. Well, she was excited with the fireworks... maybe not so tame after all.

"You can tell us another time," Cullen says, "I am sure the Herald wants to hear about yourself more."

"Don't say that as if you didn't want it too!" Herald says with squinted eyes. The man simply gives her a tiny smile.

"Any hobbies?" Josephine asks.

"I like to read." Play videogames... can't say that unless I begin a long explanation I'm not sure will be effective.

"Favourite food and drinks?" Okay... she's being thorough.

"Er... icecream, fried chicken and orange juice?" They look as astonished as I probably look unsure.

"I can understand icecream, but orange juice? It is so... plain. How can it be someone's favourite drink?" I shrug.

"I don't know, I love it. It's fresh and sweet. Do you really have icecream here?" The Antivan nods with a smile. "Oh I can't wait to have it!"

"I am unsure of how one fries a chicken however." Herald says. "Roast alright, but... fry?"

"Well... you chop it to small pieces, then you coat it in mixed eggs and flour and you put it in a tall pan filled with boiling oil... or fat, I guess you don't really have oils for that, do you?" She frowns.

"That sounds extremely unhealthy."

"It is extremely delicious! It's crunchy and succulent at the same time."

"You look happy just thinking about it, I'll take your word for it. I still think it's unhealthy."

"It can be."

"You said your world does not have magic," Cassandra says, "do you also not have demons?"

"Nope. There are spirits we can't see, some rare people can see and talk to them though. Most people don't believe that's actually something that happens, that those people are simply crazy or after money."

"Money? For dealing with... spirits?"

"Some people claim those spirits can help one do things, haunt or make another fall in love with them. Some people also think they can talk to their loved ones who died."

"It sounds like the work of demons."

"Cassandra, not all spirits are what you would call a demon." Solas calmly says, but he looks annoyed.

"Do you believe in those spirits?" Cassandra seems to ignore Solas' words and focuses on me.

"I don't really care if they're real or not. I'm not curious about that kind of thing, as long as they don't haunt me, if they exist, I'm fine."

"Do your people not... fight those spirits? Or people who commune with them?" Cullen asks and I'm surprised to hear him say that. Not because I think it's something he wouldn't say, but because I can't imagine that happening. I end up laughing.

"Sorry, sorry. It's just... I can't picture someone even being arrested for that. Well," I cough to regain my voice, "some centuries ago they used to burn women who they claimed were witches only because they knew how to use herbs to heal people. Some religions, we got lots, dislike others for thinking differently, they do say they're worshiping the devil, the biggest demon ever, but we have laws to protect people. They can worship whatever they want as long as they're not harming anybody."

"You say you do not have demons, but you have a devil, who you say is the biggest demon." Leliana points out with a frown.

"Let me try to be clearer, demons here are something we don't have over there. There are those spirits some people say exist, I don't know if they actually do. There are, however, two polar opposites in almost every religion in there, a benevolent god and an evil devil. Pretty much everything those religious nutheads believe is bad comes from the devil. If they don't understand something it's also the devil's work."

"I see. You are not religious, I take it?" The Spymaster asks.

"I believe something exists. I don't do names or shapes. Some people say it's science that created us all, from a bigass explosion in space that after millions of years started life that other millions of years later ended up being us. Sure, I think that could've happened, but we have minds, I don't think an explosion would've created minds, personalities, souls. The explosion might have given us our bodies, our worlds, but I think our souls came from somewhere else."

"Unfortunately the only thing explosion does around here is destroy things." Herald says and I actually fell bad.

"I'm sorry."

"It's not your fault."

An uncomfortable silence fills the table for a couple of minutes.

"So..." Josephine clears her throat, "when is your birthday?"

"Ah... the name of my months are different from yours. I don't even know if our worlds spin at the same speed..."

"World spinning?" Cassandra asks.

"Yeah?" I explain while using my hands as reference. "You have day and night because the world is spinning around its own axis, getting light from the sun during some hours and not during the rest. Also the cycle of seasons is because the world spins around the sun."

"You are a scholar." Josephine points out.

"Not really, we teach that kind of thing to all kids where I'm from."

"You teach those, to... children?" Cassandra asks and I nod.

"If our worlds are alike I could give so much knowledge to you all... if only I had my old books..."

"Orlais definitely would not approve of a rival." Leliana says. "It would however give much attention to the Inquisition, attention we could use to our benefit."

"Orlais can fall on its own ass for all I care, only giving education to the nobles, treating elves as shit just because they're elves, urgh..."

"When were you born in your world? Maybe we can trace an equivalent date for you, if you wish, of course." Josephine insists.

"Well... May first, that's... the fifth month of the year. What's that here?"

"That would be Summerday!" The Ambassador is unusually cheery just at that. "The first of Molioris is when we celebrate Summerday, that is a great day for a birthday."

"Oh. I guess I could use that. What day is today, by the way?"

"The twelfth of Drakonis." And I got no idea what that means... well, I need a calendar. "Your new birthday is in two months." Oh.

"That... that should be around the time when my birthday would actually be if I was still home!" At least from the last moment I remember being there.

"Maybe our worlds are not so dissimilar after all." Herald says.

"It might not be." I say with a smile.

"What is so different about your world?" Cassandra asks.

"Hmm. We don't have magic, as I said. We have... technology, science. We use machines to do stuff for us, or as tools."

"What kind of machines?" Josephine asks.

"Hmm. We have cars, which are like the carriages but they aren't pulled by anything, they have an engine inside. Like... uh... a power core? It's hard to explain because you don't have anything I can compare to." They seem pretty interested nonetheless. "We also have airplanes, which are like the cars, but they fly."

"Your people fly without magic?" Herald asks and I nod. "Amazing..."

"Yeah, it's pretty cool. There are also ships that go to space." I point upwards. "But that's still too dangerous, the engineers don't understand completely how to make it easy and cheap and not prone to explode..."

"You mean your people have travelled outside the world?" Cullen asks.

"Yeah... they have sent people out there to monitor the atmosphere and sent robots to research other planets too."

"Robots?" Solas asks.

"Machines, like... golems of sort... Without souls in them of course..."

"Souls... in golems?" Cassandra asks.

"You didn't know? The golems used by the dwarves used to be people." They look at me with shocked faces, all except Leliana.

"She speaks the truth." The Spymaster says, getting everyone to look at her instead. "In my time with the Hero of Ferelden we discovered it."

"Maker..." Cullen says.

"How was that even possible? The dwarves can't use magic." Cassandra asks, looking between me and Leliana.

"I don't know how that anvil worked, and Caridin is dead." I say and Leliana nods.

"Caridin?" Cullen asks.

"The man who created the golems, he was a golem himself by the way."

"And he killed himself after destroying the Anvil of the Void." Leliana adds. It's good to know what happened in this world. Wait... wait, wait... Anvil _of the_ _Void_. Could it be that is the same Void as the... well, _the_ Void?

"It's probably for the best." Cassandra says almost as a whisper. Maybe I should ask Solas about this... or... not... he was already in Uthenera and dwarves don't dream... urgh... I won't have answers.

"Do you know what happened to Shale, Leliana?" She seems surprised by my question.

"No. It has been a long time since I got news on her."

"Oh... I liked her." I hope she's alright.

"Do you know the Hero of Ferelden?" Leliana asks and she still seems suspicious. Well, I don't think she could _not_ be.

"That... is a complicated question."

"Oh?"

"You see... remember I know... well, options? I don't really know the specifics of what happened, but I know what _could_ have happened. Who the Hero _could_ be. I can't say which of those is actually what happened." They look among each other, I'm sure they're confused and maybe even want to interrogate me? Kill me?

"You mean you know every possible outcome to every action the Hero could have taken?" Cassandra asks.

"I might... remember a bit of those... yeah..." I hope I didn't just dig my own grave.

"And what do you mean by 'who the Hero could be'?" Cullen asks. "You mean someone else could have stopped the Blight?" I nod.

"It would depend on who Duncan managed to recruit in time. There were... quite a handful of options. Who... who is the Hero?"

"JainaBrosca." Oh.

"A casteless dwarf. Orzammar was probably in an uproar with the new noble house, wasn't it?" Leliana is surprised by my words. "A shame that Orzammar treats their own people worse than humans treat the elves at alienages."

"You do know." I shrug.

"I spent months pl- reading those stories."

"We should have you in the War Council." Leliana says and Josephine nods. They look at Cullen and he agrees.

"Your view on things give us great advantage, I hope you can remember much from those books of yours." The Commander says.

"For instance, do you know where Corypheus is?" Herald asks.

"Right now? No idea. I only know he has agents pretty much everywhere. And the Venatori are influencing nobles pretty much everywhere too. Red lyrium will cause sickness in a village somewhere... I don't remember the name..."

"Unfortunately we do not possess enough influence or funds in order to check those..." Josephine says as she flips some pages.

"The Inquisition should have enough support by the time we reach Skyhold."

"Right... so back to the reason we're here right now: to know more about you." Herald says.

"What do you want to know?" I ask and they all seem to have something in mind, but Leliana asks first:

"Do you know about Andraste? And the Maker?" Oh...

"Probably not much more than you know." She seems disappointed.

"What about the Creators?" Herald asks and my only thought is 'Oh crap.' Solas squeezes my hand lightly... I hope that's a sign that I can tell her? Oh well...

"You see, Herald... er... there is something you probably should know about the elven gods... but I'm not sure you would want to know now... right here..."

"Why not? It seems like as good a time as any."

"It's sensitive. Are you sure?"

"Well, if it's bad it's great we're already here so I can ask for some ale and drown the news."

"Don't blame the messenger... just saying." I look at the others and they're all serious, Solas included. I take a deep breath. "Would you really believe me if I tell you?"

"You're jesting, right? After everything you told us?"

"Just making sure." I sigh. "You see... they actually aren't gods." She lets her spoon drop on the table as she stares at me. "They are very powerful mages. Do you want me to continue?"

"I eh... there's more? More bad news?"

"Herald... it's all bad..."

"You don't need to talk about this now." Cassandra says and the Herald shakes her head.

"No... I want to hear it. What else? What else did the Dalish get wrong?" I sigh.

"Well... they were immortal, that much you know, and as time passed they were elevated as gods. The other elves were immortal too, the difference is that they were very old, very powerful. People learned to fear them, others sought to impress them. The... vallaslin... well, they were slave markings." She reclines fully on the chair, looking defeated. "I'm sorry."

"Sla-slave markings? But-" She takes her hand to her face. "Our own people?"

"Are you sure of this, Tina?" Cassandra asks, her face pure worry.

"Yes. It's a sad truth."

"I... the gods _wanted_ slaves?"

"They had their own, but also did the nobles, who marked their slaves with the vallaslin of the Evanuris they favoured."

"We were no better than Tevinter..." Her words are barely above a whisper. "And we got it all wrong... we used this to honor them! They... they don't deserve to be honored!"

"You could... help the other Dalish see this." I try.

"Yes... yes, you're right. They must know. I don't know how they would believe me, but they must learn the truth. We can't... we can't continue doing this ritual to honor slavers!"

"The Dalish are too set in their own ways-" Solas begins but is interrupted.

"I know you dislike the Dalish, Solas. Did you know this?" He takes a second, but nods. "Why- no matter... you probably thought I wouldn't believe you. And I probably wouldn't have..." She sighs. "Slavers... all of them... even Mythal? The All-Mother? Protector? I can't believe this..."

"Mythal was the best of them." I quote Solas. "She was... murdered by the others."

"Wait, what?" She blinks quickly a couple of times.

"The other Evanuris, they killed her, in one of their many wars. I don't know the reason, I don't know who exactly were involved, but her death set in motion many other events that led to the world you have today."

"But... if she was killed... then we got wrong that the Dread Wolf locked them away?"

"No. He did lock them away, but _because_ they killed her. The world was at the brink of destruction, so he took extreme measures to try and prevent it."

"Are you telling me the _Dread Wolf_ is the good one?!"

"Did you ever see his vallaslin anywhere?"

"No but- that was because he betrayed the gods and nobody would honor him..." She sighs. "The victor tells the tales, is it not what they say?"

"In this case nobody won, but many were left confused, became prey." I say.

"The gods stopped answering, the elves became mortal."

"Fen'Harel doesn't have a vallaslin because he freed slaves. In order to lock the Evanuris, he created the Veil-"

"No, the Maker did." Cassandra says but I shake my head solemnly.

"I don't know who your Maker is, but the Veil is a construct separating the Fade from the Waking world because there was no other way to stop the Evanuris." Cassandra seems to be reflecting and I take my attention back to the Herald. "The elves lost their immortality because of the Veil. Being separated from the Fade is what made the elves lesser than what they were."

"In my journeys into the Fade I saw elves using magic as easily as breathing." Solas says and I'm surprised he's speaking. "It was not a curse as the Circles lead people to believe."

"But a world without the Veil would mean demons roaming freely! We were given an example of what that would be like when the Breach opened!" Cullen says.

"But would they still be demons?" Solas asks. "Imagine if the Fade was not a place one went, but a state of nature like the wind. A world where imagination defines reality, where spirits were as common as trees or grass. Like a fast flowing river, yes it can drown careless children, but it can also carry a merchant's goods or grind a miller's flour. That is what the world could be if the Veil were not present. For better, or worse."

"Demons wish to kills us." Cassandra says with full conviction.

"Spirits wish to join the living, and a demon is that wish gone wrong. A dog that bites you because it is rabid is not the dog that bites you because it is starving. You may kill either, but one is just a few scraps of meat away from being your faithful servant."

"Are you saying we should not kill demons?" Cullen asks, and he's quite mad. Well, he was tortured by a demon, it's understandable.

"I am saying you should not ignore their reasons. They lash out because the rules of this world are different from the Fade's. It is tragic, not evil."

"I don't know how I feel about the possibility of magic being part of me," Herald says and she still sounds quite affected by my earlier revelations, "I don't like demons attacking us, but Solas has a point. We don't go out of our way to kill bears or wolves simply because they might attack us. In a world as he described it would be the same, wouldn't it?"

"But-" Cullen starts but is interrupted by the Herald.

"It doesn't matter, this is the world we have now. Fen'Harel raised the Veil and disappeared."

"Actually, he went into Uthenera, not to watch in glee as the elves suffered, but because the creation of the Veil drained him." I say.

"You mean he is actually out there somewhere?" I nod. "Do you know where?" Shit... I shouldn't lie, but I can't say it.

"I do, but I can't tell you." She opens her mouth to speak but I continue. "I can't. If I tell you things would change too much, I can't do it. Don't worry, you'll meet him in two or three years."

"What? I'll meet a god?" I nod.

"He's not a god, but yes. The perks of being the Herald of Andraste." I can't help snickering at my own words.

"What... what about the other gods?"

"They were still locked away by the time I came here."

"I... I'll meet with the Dread Wolf... the one who created the Veil and saved our people?" She sighs. "I... this is so much at once..."

"You insisted..."

"I know..."

"We should probably continue this another time?" Josephine asks and I'm relieved by her offer.

"That would be good... I need to get new clothes. I'm wearing his."

"We should set you up with some armor, and start your training as soon as possible." Cullen says. "What kind of training do you prefer?"

"Hm. I honestly don't know what I could be good at. Can we try every style? See what I do better at?"

"Of course." He stands up. "See me after you are done with acquiring clothes."

"I'll help you with it." Herald says. I guess Solas won't need to get me clothes after all.

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Oh and I'm so afraid of DA4... I can't even be happy for the teaser because I'm worried they'll kill Solas D: I don't know what would happen to me if he dies...


	13. A Matter of Equipment

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Tina goes shopping with the Herald and chooses a weapon. Then some argument ensues.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey! I'm sorry about the long wait. A lot of things happened, both good and bad(more bad than good but that's just my life lol). I got some other fics out while others had to wait in the background and this was one of them.  
> I hope you like the chapter :3

The Herald and I leave the tavern in silence. I assume she is probably lost in thoughts about what I revealed. I don't think it would be any easy for her to find out about the truth of her religion and what _actually_ caused the fate of the elves all at once, but she insisted...

I follow her to a building near the Chantry, and I'm surprised that it actually exists. I guess I shouldn't be, considering this is actually a real place and people would need to buy clothes somewhere. "They don't really have much, with the Breach and all the recruits." Herald tells me as we stand by the door. "The tailor only makes shemlen clothes too, but well, you're shemlen so that's fine..." she sighs and then takes a deep breath. I'm not offended but I doubt other people would take that so well. "Anyway, try not to look at her head." Eh?

"Why?"

"You don't know her?" I shake my head. "She's one of the people who were attacked by demons, Rage did a number on her." Oh. Poor woman.

"Alright." She moves to enter, "Wait. What's your name, Herald?" She looks surprised at me. Should she be? Nobody _ever_ mentions her name.

"I thought you'd know."

"I only know that you come from clan Lavellan. Would you perhaps be Ellana?" That's the default, isn't it?

"No, that'd be the First. I'm Gheina." Oh.

"Well, it's a pleasure to meet you." I give her my best smile and she seems surprised, again. "What? It's not like we were ever properly introduced."

"That's true. Well, Christina, it's nice to meet you too." And then after a brief smile she points to the door with her head. "Let's go?"

"Yes, let's see what they have."

I try my best not to look at the face of the woman, which is scarred. It must have been pretty bad if magic couldn't get her perfect again. Her hair is covered by a cowl, but the brief glimpse I took gave me information that her burns extended to her scalp and she's missing hair. She's not an old woman, and I bet this event destroyed her self-steem. I don't know what to say that would make her feel better, so I decide to just focus on business.

Turns out there really isn't much, and everything is pretty much a small variation of the previous thing I took a look at. At least they're warm and soft. I might not leave the shop with clothes that'll make me look pretty, but they'll keep me comfortable. They'll need some adjustments, so the woman takes my measurements to work on them. The Herald tells the tailor to make it a priority, because I'm one of the new advisors in the Inquisition -which I'm not happy to have spread around and now that this woman knows I'm sure everyone will too- and that she also should make me some nicer clothes. "I don't need nicer clothes." is what I tell them, but Herald insists I can't go around Haven looking like a commoner. Honestly I didn't think she would treat me like this after my revelations. It's awkward and I wish she didn't. In the end someone will deliver the clothes to Solas' home after they're adjusted and the Inquisition is paying for them. As for the nicer clothes, that'll have to wait for the next supply delivery.

The Herald, Gheina, I should remember her name, asks for a copy of my measurements and we leave. I wonder what she needs that for.

"Let's go see Harritt." She says just as we step outside.

"Harritt?" Why would I need to?

"The blacksmith? You know him too, right? You know everyone."

"I didn't know the tailor. Or most of the people in this village, but yeah... I know Harritt." I follow her as she starts walking. "But I don't even know what kind of training I'll follow, I don't need equipment."

"You'll need it, and it's good that he has your measurements so he can make you something when you decide what role you want."

"Ah, okay."

"What do you think you'll choose?" She seems genuinely interested as she looks at me.

"Hmm. I don't really know. I never thought I'd ever _actually_ fight. Whenever I played... some games back in my world I'd... pretend to be a mage. But since that's out of question here, I don't know."

"I'm really curious to see what the Commander will put you through." Is that mischief I see? Well... so far she _has_ enjoyed putting me in awkward situations.

"I'm just hoping I won't get hurt."

"Unfortunately that is something you will have to get used to in Thedas. Even Josephine sometimes gets hurt, and she rarely leaves the Chantry." Well, she _will_ suffer assassination attempts.

"What happened to her?"

"Nothing serious. One of Leliana's crows scratched her when she was sending a message."

"Good to know, I won't be getting anywhere near them." Gheina laughs.

It's not long until we arrive at Harritt, and while Gheina talks to him I observe the horse she was riding in the stall nearby. Where are the others? The stables look pretty much empty.

The man greets me, and I introduce myself. "I'll come back when I decide what kind of equipment I'll need."

"You do that. And don't worry, you'll have the best." I give him a smile, knowing that he is one of the best smiths in Ferelden.

"Let's go see the Commander, Tina." The Herald leads the way and I only have enough time for a quick 'bye' before she's too far away for me to keep up without running.

 

The training yard is full of soldiers, and the clashing of metal is quite noisy. I spot Cullen easily among the other people, who are both women and men, elf and human, there are even some dwarves, which surprises me. The Commander sees us approaching and offers a smile, which I return. "Ready to find out your role?" Gheina asks with a smirk.

"As ready as I will ever be, I guess."

"Afraid?" Cullen asks.

"A bit... I've never even held a weapon before."

"Well, that's about to change. Come over here." He walks towards a stand with a few types of blades, broad and long, slim and long, slim and short, curved. "There are people who say the weapon chooses the wielder, I don't really believe that, but go ahead. Anything catches your eye?" I hesitate, looking at them as if they could fly my way and turn me into a pin-cushion at any moment. "Don't worry, they're all blunt for training." Blunt weapons still hurt.

I sigh and step closer. And nope... none really catches my eye. "They don't talk to me, so I guess they either don't want me or that's nonsense." Cullen chuckles and I end up smiling too. I don't think I could ever wield the broad one, that looks too heavy and hard to use. To think that Fenris uses something even bigger than this makes me respect him a lot more. I go to the longsword. I don't think I could learn to be swift and sneaky in such short time to use daggers efficiently. The sword is heavier than anything I'm used to carrying with one hand; it's probably three kilos and I can already see the heavy workout that this training is going to be.

"Come on, time to hit something with it." Gheina says. "And don't worry, you can change to another if you think that's not what you really want."

"No... I'm staying with this one. There's no way I could learn to be a rogue in such short time."

"Well, if you change your mind, know that it's an option." She says and I nod.

"I will assign you a personal trainer," Cullen says as we walk towards the dummies, "you should learn to defend yourself as soon as possible."

"I don't want to trouble anybody. I could train with the recruits."

"No. You need intensive training." The people at the dummies stop to watch us approaching. "Recruits, eyes on your target!" And they resume their attempts at slashing the creepy strawmen with blunt swords and daggers. The Commander turns to me once more. "See their stance? You need to be steady on your feet at all times, no matter if your target is a dummy." He walks to the third recruit from me and with a simple sliding of his armored foot around the man's leg, the man goes to the ground. "You need to build muscle memory, so you practice your stance at all times." He does the same to the next recruit, who doesn't move. Cullen pats him on the shoulder. "Good stance, recruit." I see the one who fell on the ground is quite breathless. Training must be hard for him. "So, Tina, this won't be easy, but it's necessary." A messenger approaches with a paper and hands it to Cullen, who immediately reads it and sighs.

"Trouble, Commander?" Gheina asks.

"A dragon has been attacking near the Crossroads."

"Do you have to kill it? Please don't kill it." I say and they look at me with surprised faces.

"She's going to start killing people after she's done with the livestock." Cullen says. "And we can't let it kill the livestock either."

"Can't you lure it somewhere?"

"That's dangerous. We would probably lose people attempting it. Why do you care? It's a monster."

"It's a magnificent creature, Commander."

"It destroys everything."

"Only for food or defense. Not unlike people."

"You can't talk to a dragon."

"You can't talk to some people either. You saw how bandits and those crazy templars and mages didn't want to listen."

He sighs. "We don't have the resources to lure it away."

"Did you just give up on killing it?" Gheina asks with wide eyes.

"No, because there's no other way." Damn it.

"You would have then?" She insists.

"If we could I don't see why not. The dragon needs to leave, it doesn't matter how."

"Well, I'm going to kill it. I could use the better armor. And sword too. I hear dragon bone makes great blades." What...

"Really?" I ask. "That's all it is to you? Leather and bones for armor and weapons?" She shrugs.

"We need the best equipment if what you said is ahead is true. Which I believe it is. There's nothing better than dragon."

"That's so wrong... she's a life, not a thing you harvest for goods."

"Too bad it isn't, or we could have more of it."

"Urgh... I'm going back. I'll start training in the morning, Commander... now I can't."

"Did you really have to say it like that?" I hear Cullen asking as I walk away.

"What? It's the truth."

That's just sickening. I understand using leather when you _have_ to kill an animal, either for food or survival, it's a way to honor the life that was lost by making its body useful after it died... but deliberately killing a creature that wasn't even back until a few years ago? Dragons would probably be on the endangered list if such a thing existed in Thedas and she wants to kill it to make armor! I hope Solas is home, I need a hug.

 


	14. Changing the Future

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Conversations in Haven.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry about the wait, I couldn't update sooner for plenty of reasons, good and bad. I hope you haven't given up on the story(if you have you won't read this :s) and that you like the chapter.  
> Oh and I have a Patreon now, if you'd like to help me get my original works out there let me know so I can post a link(or check my profile for the name).

I find Solas outside the house watching the Breach. The similarity with the game makes me chuckle and it catches his attention. He gives me an inquisitive look and I just approach with a smile on my face.

"What is it that makes you laugh?" He asks.

"Just... in the game your character would always be here, looking like he is thinking about something."

"And why is that amusing? Should it not be eerie instead?"

"For the people here maybe, to me it just... makes me feel safer."

"I see. Knowing that what you think you know is actually true gives you stability."

"Yeah... something like that. Solas... do you think it's right to kill dragons?"

"It depends. Killing a dragon because it threatens a village may be a righteous decision while hunting a dragon living out in the wilderness could be a waste of life."

"The Herald wants to kill a dragon near the Hinterland's Crossroads just for materials to make armor."

"Better armor could be the difference between life and death. And The Crossroads has people living there, the dragon was likely attracted to the source of food."

"But the dragons are endangered! There aren't many of them left, they should be preserved! The Inquisition could lead it somewhere it wouldn't harm anybody instead of killing it. They could make armor out of something else!"

"Would you die if it meant a dragon would be spared?"

"What?"

"Would you allow five or more loyal soldiers to die so a dragon could be spared?"

"Well, I don't know. Why are you asking that?"

"How do you measure a life's worth?"

"I don't- that's a difficult question."

"It is. Life is not something that should be taken lightly. Whose life you take should mean a worthier would be saved. You're basing your line of thought on the amount of dragons left in the world, I can see the merit in that, but what about the people the Inquisition could save if that one dragon wasn't allowed to kill them? Are their lives worth less than a single dragon?"

"They could still lure it somewhere else!"

"Which was my second question. Surely you know people would die luring a dragon somewhere. Is their life worth less? Would their absence in a post not make a difference? Perhaps that soldier who dies trying to lure the dragon away would have saved a child's life against an attack somewhere else."

"They might not die. As for the absence someone else would be there to replace them."

"Would they? I have heard the Commander complaining about not having enough people in the Inquisition. I have heard the Spymaster complain about spies and traitors. But aside from that, have  you  _seen_ a dragon, Tina?"

"Well, in the game, yes."

"Right." A moment of silence. "Would you like to see a dragon and understand what you're asking the Inquisition to do?"

I'm sure my eyes are bright. "Can I?"

"You look eager."

"I am! Dragons are amazing creatures!"

"That they are. And dangerous. Still, I could show you a few memories if you wish."

"Oh I want to see it! Can you really show me? You said I don't dream in the Fade."

"I can still summon you to it, somehow."

Oh right, he did it once. "Well, then sure!"

"Tonight, then."

"I can't wait!" I'm sure it'll be awesome! "So... what were you doing here?"

"Thinking. Are you sure the Herald will close the Breach?"

"Yes. Just need one of the groups to help."

"I never expected something like this to happen."

"I know."

"Do you, really?" His sudden seriousness almost scared me. "Can you really understand?"

"I won't pretend to understand what you've been through, but I... sympathize with your wish to change what the world has become. And I will always support you."

"Why?"

"Because I agree with you. And I want to see you happy."

"Because she's madly in love with you." The Herald says, coming from between the apothecary and the house near it. I think I measured my words enough that nobody who listened in would suspect anything, but her sudden presence still bugs me. Was she listening in? "And a girl in love will do anything. Isn't that right?"

"Ah... I guess it is."

"I came here to talk to you, Solas, since you seem to know so much about what the Dalish got wrong."

"You did not seem so interested in knowing what I had to say before."

"Well, that was before Tina showed up and told me all those things." She sighs. "I... apologize if I have offended you before. You understand it's not easy to learn what you grew up believing is all lies, right?"

"No, I imagine it isn't. Very well, what do you wish to know?"

"I'll let you two talk." I say before giving Solas a quick kiss on his cheek, surprising the both of them. Isn't that something common here? "See you."

"She's not afraid of showing her affection." I hear Gheina say with a chuckle as I walk away.

 

Standing at the center of Haven I try to figure out what to do. I have already told them many things, I should let the information sink in and allow them time to work on what they can. There isn't anything fun to do around here, though. I guess I could just walk around and see the place. Just as I take five steps I remember Solas telling me I shouldn't walk around, that it wouldn't be safe. But how dangerous could it be inside Haven? I guess I can talk to Varric safely enough.

I reach the dwarf without any issues, but I notice how everyone does a double check my way. I'm not  _that_ different from Vivienne, why do they stare?

"Dreamy." Varric says with a smile. "To what do I owe your presence?"

"Why the formality?"

"Why, I'm just wondering what you could want with someone you already know everything about."

"Ah, I hope you're not bothered by it?"

"More like cautious."

"I guess I understand. Well, I just came to talk, really. There isn't much I can do here and I always thought you were a nice guy to talk to."

"Trying to get on my good side? That's always a good place to start. Know what else would get you on my good side? Sit there and tell me this mess will be over."

"I don't need to say that only to get on your good side, it will be over."

"Really?"

"Yeah, the Herald can solve everything."

"Oh, that's a relief. Now I can continue to plan for the future instead of the end of the world."

That makes me laugh, but I know he meant it even if it sounded like a joke. "That you can. Say, what is Hawke like?"

"You don't know?"

"I know the kind of person he could be, the paths he could have taken in life, but I don't know him. To me he could also have been a woman."

"Well, Hawke is a fair man, the Seeker doesn't think so, but Kirkwall was only standing by the time we left because of him."

"Is Anders alive?"

"Alive? I don't know if the Anders I used to know is still there somewhere, but yes, Hawke let him go after what he did." He sighs. "It costed the city a backlash from Choir Boy, well,  _Prince_ of Starkhaven now."

"So Hawke is a nice person?"

"Some would say too nice, why?"

"I have some information that might really help you like me, if you want one of those."

"And what do you want in exchange?"

"Exchange?"

"Well, when people say they have something they usually want something for it."

"Nah, it was just a way of saying. I don't want anything in return. It's about Hawke."

"What about Hawke? Is he in danger?"

"No more than usual. At least for now." And this made him very serious. I never thought I would think Varric was scary. "If I don't tell you now, when you contact him it might be too late to change what I want to change."

"Out with it, Dreamy, you're worrying me."

"I know you can contact him, but I need you to contact him soon. You and Hawke met a Grey Warden when you went in that little trip into the Deeproads that made you rich, who were they?"

He frowned. "Stroud. What about him?" Mustache-man.

"Alright. I don't know if you know, but Hawke is or will be searching for him soon, I don't know if he's already there, but he will go to Crestwood, but by the time Hawke gets there too much shit will have already happened. The Inquisition doesn't have resources to act now-"

"Woa, slow down Dreamy. Hawke is searching for Stroud, that's right, but what is this danger? Is it Stroud?"

"I was getting there."

"Right, continue then. Slower."

"So, Grey Wardens are having some problems among them, I can tell you it's not good. Not good at all. Stroud is hiding from them and he will eventually be in Crestwood, I don't know if he's already there. The thing is, by the time Hawke gets there the problem the Grey Wardens have will be much worse."

"So what are you saying? I should warn Hawke to go to Crestwood?"

"To warn Hawke to meet with Stroud sooner, if that means getting to Crestwood then yes, go there. And if he can get an army with him to support the Inquisition it would be much appreciated."

He frowned. "Why would you need an army for whatever the Grey Wardens are facing?"

"Hmmm." Should I tell him? I guess it would help get things moving. " _We_ will be facing  _them_ in the future."

"What? Against the Grey Wardens?"

"Yes. Remember Corypheus?"

"The Darkspawn?"

"The one and only, thankfully there's only one of him. Anyway, he can control something the Wardens fear more than anything, so he pretty much controls the Wardens. And-"

"Wait, I said to go slow. What is this thing the Wardens fear? Sunshine is a Warden."

"Sunshine? That's..."

"Hawke's sister, Bethany."

"Oh right. Sorry, in the g- stories it's usually Carver who survives."

"Survives? Is she going to die?"

"Calm down, she'll be fine." I think. "I meant one of them dies when they're fleeing the Blight and in the stories I've read it's usually Bethany."

"You talk coldly about them as if they're just characters in a book, they're people, you know."

"I'm sorry, it's just that..." I sigh, "I haven't met them, I have only heard about them through stories."

"Is that how you feel about me? About the others? Do you still think this is all a dream?"

"No, of course not."

He shakes his head and sighs. "Tell me about this thing with the Wardens, I have to warn Hawke."

"Right. Ah, where was I? Oh, right, Corypheus. So... this I'm telling you is what Stroud will tell Hawke and the Herald when they meet him in Crestwood-"

"The Herald?"

"Yes, in the story I know you would eventually ask Hawke to come to the Inquisition because of Corypheus, he would tell the Herald to go with him to Crestwood where he would meet with his Warden contact."

He scratches his chest. "You're letting things out, aren't you? Because this doesn't make sense."

"A few things, yes. But it's necessary. Just worry about getting Hawke to meet with Stroud sooner and maybe acquire an army on the way?"

"Dreamy, one doesn't  _acquire_ an army on the way to some place in the middle of Ferelden."

"But Hawke knows people, doesn't he? How damaged is his relationship with Sebastian?"

"I'd say very damaged. Everyone in the old party is busy somewhere too, and even though they're strong they aren't an army."

"Well, they'd be great help against what the Inquisition will have to fight. Could you ask them to join us? By the way, I'd  _very_ much like to meet Fenris, and I've heard our Herald is in love with him."

"She's enchanted by a person in a book, as realistic as I try to make my stories, some things have to be changed if I want people to buy them."

"Still, try to bring them?"

"To fight Grey Wardens?"

"No. To fight Grey Wardens and Corypheus with a bigass army."

"I should have said this before, but Corypheus is dead."

"No, he isn't. He can revive himself, ugly thing, don't recommend watching."

"Okay, let me see if I got this right, Corypheus who should be dead is back and controlling Grey Wardens with an army?"

"Yes!" I don't think I should be smiling, but it slipped because I'm glad he understood it.

"Shit."

"Yeah, it's bad. So... try to contact Hawke and your friends soon, we really could use the help."

"Have you told the Seeker this?"

"Some of it. Oh and... be prepared for when Cassandra sees Hawke, she'll be pissed you lied about knowing where he was."

"I couldn't let her bring him, he would likely be dead along with everyone in that Temple."

"I know. I agree with you, but she'll complain, a lot."

He sighs. "Very well, I should write this message. Thanks for the warning, Dreamy."

I take that as he wanting me gone. "Just trying to make things better. See you around, Varric."

As I walk away I think that I should probably go back to the cabin, I don't want to risk finding Iron Bull.

 

Solas isn't talking to Gheina anymore, in fact he isn't in front of the cabin anymore. I find him inside reading. "I just did something that I hope wasn't a mistake." He raises an eyebrow, but doesn't say anything. "I told Varric some things and asked him to contact Hawke soon, so we could have more help against Corypheus and the Grey Wardens."

"Do you trust Varric and Hawke to help us?"

"Against Corypheus and the Grey Warden madness? Yes."

"Then why would it be a mistake?"

"Because they weren't supposed to come into play until after we got to Skyhold."

"I see. I suppose we will have to wait for the events to unfold."

"I guess we will. Was your conversation with the Herald fruitful?"

"She still dislikes the idea of magic and spirits among us, but has accepted fairly well the truth about her gods."

"You don't sound very happy about it."

"In face of the truth she is still reluctant to accept some things, but I suppose it is difficult to break some habits and beliefs. At least she has the conviction to spread the truth about the vallaslin, it will shock some clans, but it is a start if they choose to believe her. I assume many will dismiss her words, claiming she has been corrupted by humans, but that is the way things are, not all people can be saved."

"That's so grim and fatalistic."

"I am grim and fatalistic, do not let Varric's name for me fool you." He smirks.

"Well, you do have quite the cute chuckle, I was sure he named you after it because of that." I give him a smirk in return.

"He will gladly invent any quality I lack."

"I think he just sees you more clearly than you see yourself. You see yourself through a layer of guilt, he doesn't have that."

"Perhaps."

 

***

 

She sits on the bed and looks at him; she's unsettled by something, but takes a while to speak. "Solas... I couldn't ask this before; are we... what are we now?"

"What do you mean?"

"After last night, what we did, what are we? Are we still friends or...?"

What are they? She loves him, wants to be with him for as long as he lets her, he wants to let her stay, but can he really trust her? She has shown him her wish to help him, to protect his identity and she wants him to succeed, but he doesn't love her, not yet. If he is completely honest he almost regrets what they did; he should have been stronger, should have waited, but it has been too long since he was loved, since he was desired, since  _he_ desired someone. To some people a physical relationship means nothing, but to her it surely means something special, she is a romantic and had her feelings flowing through her pores while they had sex. No, made love would be a more accurate term, she wasn't with him for pleasure alone, she gave him her heart. He told her she could call him vhenan, it was only fair, but what are they? He could not give her his heart yet.

"I am not sure." She is clearly disappointed, if not saddened by his answer. "It has been a long time for me and this that we have is too sudden. If I could have time to think-"

"Sure. I understand. I said I was being selfish, I shouldn't have pushed you. If you regret-"

"No, you misunderstand. I don't regret it, I just don't know where to go from there."

"And would you prefer if I'm with you while you decide?"

"I would." There is no doubt there. Even though he doesn't know where he stands, how to calm his racing heart to properly understands what he feels, he knows he wants her close. Not only he needs her for her knowledge of the future and events, he wants her company. "I don't know what we are, but I want you with me."

She shows him her beautiful and enchanting smile that has captured his attention since the first time. "That is enough for me."

 


End file.
